名人演講:Heal the Children, Heal the World 拯救兒童，拯救世界[邁克爾·杰克遜]

Heal the Children, Heal the World 拯救兒童，拯救世界
——Micheal Jackson 邁克爾·杰克遜

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[00:02.61]Thank you dear friends,

[00:03.65]from the bottom of my heart,

[00:06.37]for such a loving

[00:07.23]and spirited welcome,

[00:09.01]and thank you, Mr. President,

[00:10.48]for your kind invitation to me

[00:12.53]which I am so honored to accept.

[00:15.21]I also want to express

[00:16.46]a special thanks to you Shmuley,

[00:18.40]who for 11 years

[00:20.07]served as Rabbi here at Oxford.

[00:22.59]You and I

[00:23.29]have been working so hard

[00:24.70]to form Heal the Kids,

[00:26.44]as well as writing our book

[00:27.95]about childlike qualities,

[00:29.52]and in all of our efforts

[00:30.88]you have been such a supportive

[00:32.62]and loving friend.

[00:46.17]And I also want to thank Toba Friedman,

[00:48.78]our director of operations

[00:50.05]at Heal the Kids,

[00:51.09]who is returning tonight

[00:52.89]to the alma mater

[00:54.06]where she served as a Marshall scholar,

[00:56.47]as well as Marilyn Piels,

[00:58.58]another central member

[00:59.88]of our Heal the Kids team.

[01:01.84]I am humbled

[01:03.39]to be lecturing in a place

[01:05.59]that has previously been filled

[01:07.49]by such notable figures

[01:09.18]as Mother Theresa,

[01:10.79]Albert Einstein,

[01:12.88]Ronald Reagan,

[01:14.32]Robert Kennedy

[01:15.91]and Malcolm X.

[01:17.80]I've even heard

[01:18.55]that Kermit the Frog

[01:19.46]has made an appearance here,

[01:22.49]and I've always felt

[01:22.88]a kinship with Kermit's message

[01:25.10]that it's not easy being green.

[01:29.35]I'm sure he didn't find it

[01:31.61]any easier being up here than I do!

[01:34.93]As I looked around Oxford,

[01:36.56]I can't help

[01:37.37]but be aware of the majesty

[01:40.17]and grandeur of this great institution,

[01:44.26]not to mention the brilliance

[01:46.14]of the great and gifted minds

[01:49.39]that have roamed these streets

[01:50.90]for centuries.

[01:52.40]The walls of Oxford

[01:54.09]have not only housed the greatest philosophical

[01:56.25]and scientific geniuses

[01:58.40]they also have ushered forth

[01:59.74]some of the most cherished

[02:01.68]creators of children's literature,

[02:04.70]from J.R.R. Tolkien

[02:06.62]to C.S. Lewis.

[02:08.10]Lewis Carroll's Alice in wonderland

[02:10.17]is immortalized

[02:11.63]in the stained glass windows

[02:12.52]in Christ Church.

[02:14.67]And even one of my own fellow Americans,

[02:16.97]the beloved Dr. Seuss,

[02:19.51]he graced these halls

[02:21.38]and then went on to leave his mark

[02:23.13]on the imaginations

[02:24.10]of millions of children

[02:25.40]throughout the world.

[02:27.95]I suppose I should start by

[02:30.23]listing my qualifications

[02:31.84]to speak before you this evening.

[02:34.63]Friends,

[02:36.13]I do not have to claim

[02:39.08]the academic expertise of other speakers

[02:43.03]who have addressed this hall,

[02:45.16]just as they could lay little claim

[02:47.23]at being adept at the moonwalk

[02:51.31]and you know,

[02:52.28]Einstein in particular

[02:53.54]was really terrible at that.

[02:56.90]But I do have a claim

[03:00.03]to having experienced

[03:01.06]more places and cultures

[03:02.48]than most people will ever see.

[03:05.16]Human knowledge consists

[03:06.14]not only of libraries

[03:07.37]of parchment and ink

[03:09.22]it is also comprised

[03:10.32]of the volumes of knowledge

[03:12.23]that are written on the human heart,

[03:14.10]chiseled on the human soul,

[03:15.99]and engraved on the human psyche.

[03:18.22]And friends,

[03:19.36]I have encountered so much

[03:23.62]in this short lifetime

[03:25.87]of mine that I still cannot believe

[03:27.61]that I am only 42.

[03:30.66]I often tell Shmuley

[03:32.38]that in soul years

[03:33.75]I'm sure that I'm at least 80

[03:36.61]and tonight I even walk like I'm 80!

[03:41.52]So please harken to my message,

[03:43.62]because what I have to tell you tonight

[03:45.14]can bring healing to humanity

[03:47.25]and healing to our planet.

[03:49.69]Through the grace of God,

[03:51.92]I have been fortunate

[03:53.00]to have achieved many of my artistic

[03:54.91]and professional aspirations

[03:57.09]realized early in my lifetime.

[03:58.47]But these, friends,

[04:00.37]are accomplishments,

[04:02.04]and accomplishments

[04:03.69]alone are not who I am.

[04:07.01]Indeed, the cheery five-year-old

[04:08.97]who belted out Rockin' Robin

[04:10.39]and Ben to adoring crowds

[04:14.00]was not indicative

[04:15.92]of the boy behind the smile.

[04:17.63]Tonight,

[04:18.47]I come before you less as an icon of pop

[04:21.35]whatever that means anyway

[04:23.99]and more as an icon of a generation,

[04:28.22]a generation

[04:28.94]that no longer knows what it means

[04:30.02]to be children.

[04:32.88]All of us are products of our childhood.

[04:35.96]But I am the product of a lack

[04:37.38]of a childhood,

[04:39.15]an absence of that precious

[04:41.22]and wondrous age

[04:42.94]when we frolic playfully

[04:44.44]without a care in the world,

[04:46.19]basking in the adoration

[04:47.55]of parents and relatives,

[04:49.51]where our biggest concern is studying

[04:51.38]for that big spelling test

[04:53.14]come Monday morning.

[04:55.26]Those of you who are familiar

[04:56.66]with the Jackson Five

[04:58.27]know that I began performing

[04:59.87]at the tender age of five

[05:01.86]and that ever since then,

[05:03.45]I haven't stopped dancing or singing.

[05:05.19]But while performing

[05:07.20]and making music undoubtedly

[05:08.83]remain as many of my greatest joys,

[05:12.83]when I was young

[05:14.01]I wanted more than anything else

[05:16.56]to be a typical little boy.

[05:18.89]I wanted to build tree houses,

[05:21.56]have water balloon fights,

[05:23.01]and play hide and seek with my friends.

[05:25.57]But fate had it otherwise

[05:27.86]and all I could do

[05:28.80]was envy the laughter and playtime

[05:29.95]that seemed to be going on all around me.

[05:33.30]There was no respite

[05:35.12]from my professional lifetyle.

[05:36.56]For on Sundays

[05:37.66]I would go Pioneering,

[05:39.40]the term used for the missionary work

[05:41.67]that Jehovah's Witnesses do.

[05:43.90]And it was then

[05:44.95]that I was able to see the magic

[05:47.59]of other people's childhood.

[05:50.18]Since I was already a celebrity,

[05:52.73]I would have to put on a disguise

[05:54.71]of fat suit,

[05:55.73]a wig,

[05:56.97]a beard

[05:58.07]and glasses

[05:59.60]and we would spend the day

[06:00.88]in the suburbs of Southern California,

[06:02.89]going door-to-door

[06:04.21]or making the rounds of shopping malls,

[06:06.05]distributing our Watchtower magazine.

[06:10.49]I loved to set foot

[06:12.00]in all those regular suburban houses

[06:13.71]and catch sight

[06:14.71]of the fireplaces

[06:15.89]and La-Z-Boy armchairs

[06:17.46]with kids playing Monopoly

[06:18.99]and grandmas baby-sitting

[06:20.43]and all those wonderful,

[06:22.00]ordinary and starry scenes

[06:24.16]of everyday life.

[06:26.29]Many, I know,

[06:27.73]would argue

[06:28.63]that these things seem like no big deal.

[06:31.24]But to me they were mesmerizing.

[06:37.04]I used to think

[06:38.22]that I was unique in feeling

[06:40.17]that I was without a childhood.

[06:42.48]I believed that indeed

[06:43.81]there were only a handful of people

[06:45.43]with whom I could share those feelings.

[06:48.31]When I recently met

[06:49.23]with Shirley Temple Black,

[06:50.81]the great child star of the 1930s and 40s,

[06:54.58]we said nothing to each other

[06:56.20]at first,

[06:57.73]we simply CRIed together,

[07:00.85]for she could share a pain with me

[07:03.65]that only others like my close friends

[07:05.92]Elizabeth Taylor

[07:07.00]and McCauley Culkin could.

[07:09.62]I do not tell you this

[07:11.89]to gain your sympathy

[07:13.33]but to impress upon you my important point

[07:16.15]It is not just Hollywood child stars

[07:18.74]that have suffered

[07:19.58]from a nonexistent childhood.

[07:21.64]Today, it's a universal calamity,

[07:24.26]a global catastrophe.

[07:26.34]Childhood has become

[07:27.80]the great casualty of modern-day living.

[07:30.87]All around us we are producing scores

[07:33.37]of kids who have not had the joy,

[07:35.77]who have not been accorded the right,

[07:38.09]who have not been allowed the freedom,

[07:39.99]or knowing what it's like to be a kid.

[07:43.62]Today's children are constantly

[07:45.40]encouraged to grow up faster,

[07:47.86]as if this period known as childhood

[07:49.80]is a burdensome stage,

[07:51.83]to be endured and ushered through,

[07:53.94]as swiftly as possible.

[07:56.15]And on that subject,

[07:57.45]I am certainly one of the

[07:58.85]world's greatest experts.

[08:01.47]Ours is a generation

[08:02.88]that has witnessed

[08:03.95]the abrogation

[08:04.91]of the parent-child covenant.

[08:06.16]Psychologists are publishing

[08:09.01]libraries of books

[08:10.69]detailing the destructive effects

[08:12.22]of denying one's children

[08:13.54]the unconditional love

[08:15.18]that is so necessary

[08:16.45]to the healthy development

[08:17.70]of their minds and character.

[08:20.62]And because of all the neglect,

[08:22.72]too many of our kids essentially

[08:24.28]have to raise themselves.

[08:26.74]They are growing more distant

[08:29.14]from their parents,

[08:30.30]grandparents

[08:31.59]and other family members,

[08:33.16]as all around us

[08:34.78]the indestructible bond

[08:36.12]that once glued together the generations,

[08:38.48]unravels.

[08:40.81]This violation has bred a new generation,

[08:44.56]Generation O,

[08:46.45]let us call it Generation O,

[08:48.78]that has now picked up

[08:49.92]the torch from Generation X.

[08:52.33]The O stands for a generation

[08:54.04]that has everything on the outside

[08:56.03]wealth, success,

[08:58.75]fancy clothing

[09:00.96]and fancy cars,

[09:03.25]but an aching emptiness

[09:05.69]on the inside.

[09:07.72]That cavity in our chests,

[09:09.37]that barrenness at our core,

[09:11.62]that void in our centre

[09:13.08]is the place

[09:14.22]where the heart once beat

[09:16.57]and which love once occupied.

[09:19.52]It's not just the kids

[09:21.02]who are suffering.

[09:22.26]It's the parents as well.

[09:24.52]For the more we cultivate little-adults

[09:26.63]in kids' bodies,

[09:27.96]the more removed

[09:29.49]we ourselves become

[09:31.03]from our own child-like qualities,

[09:34.10]and there is so much about being a child

[09:37.34]that is worth retaining

[09:38.19]in adult life.

[09:41.70]Love.

[09:43.34]Ladies and gentlemen,

[09:45.05]love is the human family's

[09:47.53]most precious legacy,

[09:49.88]its richest bequest,

[09:51.63]its golden inheritance.

[09:53.94]And it is a treasure

[09:55.41]that is handed down

[09:56.35]from one generation to the other.

[09:58.75]Previous ages may not have had

[10:01.21]the wealth we enjoy.

[10:03.11]Their houses may have lacked electricity,

[10:05.51]and they squeezed their many kids

[10:07.34]into small homes without central heating.

[10:10.20]But those homes had no darkness,

[10:12.21]nor were they cold.

[10:14.46]They were lit bright

[10:15.97]with the glow of love

[10:17.79]and they were warmed snugly

[10:19.22]by the very heat of the human heart.

[10:21.47]Parents,

[10:22.34]undistracted by the lust

[10:24.16]for luxury and status,

[10:25.90]accorded their children primacy

[10:27.78] in their lives.

[10:29.44]As you all know,

[10:32.01]our two countries

[10:34.87]broke from each other

[10:35.96]over what Thomas Jefferson referred to as

[10:37.93]"certain inalienable rights".

[10:41.49]While we Americans and British

[10:43.22]might dispute the justice of his claims,

[10:46.60]what has never been in dispute

[10:48.55]is that children have certain obvious rights,

[10:52.28]and the gradual erosion of those rights

[10:55.02]has led to scores of children worldwide

[10:58.49]being denied the joys

[11:00.16]and security of childhood.

[11:03.35]I would therefore like to propose tonight

[11:06.39]that we install in every home

[11:09.00]a Children's Universal Bill of Rights,

[11:12.80]the tenets of which are:

[11:14.63]The right to be loved

[11:18.97]without having to earn it.

[11:20.44]The right to be protected,

[11:22.97]without having to deserve it.

[11:26.35]The right to feel valuable,

[11:29.00]even if you came into the world with nothing.

[11:32.70]The right to be listened to

[11:34.60]without having to be interesting.

[11:38.20]The right to be read a bedtime story

[11:41.35]without having to compete

[11:43.40]with the evening news or Eastenders.

[11:51.93]The right to an education

[11:55.51]without having to dodge bullets at schools.

[11:59.40]The right to be thought of as adorable

[12:05.49]even if you have a face

[12:07.26]that only a mother could love.

[12:13.14]Friends

[12:14.72]the foundation of all human knowledge,

[12:16.68]the beginning of human consciousness,

[12:18.61]must be that each

[12:20.46]and every one of us is an object of love.

[12:23.47]Before you know

[12:24.42] if you have red hair or brown,

[12:28.39]before you know

[12:29.39]if you are black or white,

[12:30.90]before you know

[12:31.52]of what religion you are a part of,

[12:33.80]you have to know

[12:34.51]that you are loved.

[12:38.00]About twelve years ago,

[12:39.94]when I was just about

[12:41.01]to start my Bad tour,

[12:42.85]a little boy came with his parents

[12:45.09]to visit me at my California home.

[12:47.36]He was dying of cancer

[12:49.64]and he told me how much he loved

[12:51.30]me and my music.

[12:53.35]His parents told me

[12:54.82]that he wasn't going to live,

[12:56.96]that any day he could just go,

[12:59.24]and I said to him:

[13:01.07]"Look, I am going to be

[13:00.89]coming to your hometown in Kansas

[13:03.79]to start my tour in three months.

[13:06.77]I want you to come to the show.

[13:08.64]I am going to give you this jacket

[13:10.31]that I wore in one of my videos.

[13:12.66]His eyes lit up

[13:14.06]and he said,

[13:14.72]"You are gonna give me the jacket?"

[13:15.85]I said, "Yeah, I'm going to give you the jacket,

[13:17.82]but you have to promise me

[13:19.71]that you will wear it to the show."

[13:22.12]I was trying to make him hold on.

[13:24.65]I said, "When you come to the show

[13:26.62]I want to see you in this jacket

[13:28.49]and in this glove",

[13:29.81]and I gave him one of my rhinestone gloves,

[13:31.14]which I never give to anyone.

[13:34.43]And he was just in heaven.

[13:37.64]But maybe he was too close to heaven,

[13:40.23]because when I came to his town,

[13:41.90]he had already died,

[13:44.87]and they had buried him

[13:46.95]in the glove and jacket.

[13:50.50]He was just 10 years old.

[13:53.36]God knows,

[13:54.17]and I know,

[13:55.53]that he tried his best to hold on.

[14:02.48]But at least when he died,

[14:04.88]he knew that he was loved,

[14:06.30]not only by his parents,

[14:07.93]but even by me.

[14:09.09]As a near stranger,

[14:10.51]I also loved him.

[14:12.43]And with all of that love

[14:15.82]he knew that

[14:16.43]he didn't come into this world alone,

[14:18.60]and he certainly didn't leave it alone.

[14:21.58]If you enter this world

[14:23.18]knowing you are loved

[14:24.85]and you leave this world knowing the same,

[14:27.36]then everything that happens in between

[14:29.40]can he dealt with.

[14:32.32]A professor may degrade you,

[14:34.58]but you will not feel degraded;

[14:36.48]a boss may crush you,

[14:38.63]but you will not be crushed;

[14:40.33]a corporate gladiator might vanquish you,

[14:43.00]but you will still triumph.

[14:45.33]How could any of them truly prevail

[14:47.97]in pulling you down?

[14:49.96]For you know

[14:50.64]that you are an object worthy of love.

[14:53.85]The rest is just packaging.

[14:56.76]But if you don't have

[14:57.74]that memory of being loved,

[14:59.26]you are condemned

[15:00.66]to search the world for something

[15:02.00]to fill you up.

[15:03.49]But no matter how much money you make

[15:05.59]or how famous you become,

[15:07.51]you will still feel empty.

[15:09.57]What you are really searching for

[15:10.95]is unconditional love,

[15:14.11]unqualified acceptance.

[15:18.03]And that was the one thing

[15:19.29]that was denied to you at birth.

[15:22.20]Friends,

[15:23.08]let me paint a picture for you.

[15:27.61]Here is a typical day in America

[15:30.16]six youths

[15:31.07]under the age of 20

[15:32.89]will commit suicide,

[15:35.25]12 children under the age of 20

[15:38.29]will die from firearms

[15:40.82]remember this is a DAY,

[15:42.44]not a year

[15:44.26]399 kids will be arrested for drug abuse

[15:48.60]1,352 babies

[15:51.20]will be born to teen mothers.

[15:53.72]This is happening in

[15:54.20]one of the richest,

[15:55.59]most developed countries

[15:56.75]in the history of the world.

[15:59.53]Yes, in my country

[16:01.29]there is an epidemic of violence

[16:03.45]that parallels no other industrialized nation.

[16:06.59]These are the ways young people

[16:09.04]in America express their hurt

[16:11.36]and their anger.

[16:13.28]But don't think

[16:14.37]that there is not the same pain

[16:15.59]and anguish among their counterparts

[16:17.83]in the United Kingdom.

[16:20.05]Studies in this country show

[16:22.30]that every single hour,

[16:24.36]three teenagers in the UK

[16:26.26]inflict harm upon themselves,

[16:28.73]often by cutting or burning themselves

[16:31.29]burning their bodies

[16:32.40]or taking an overdose.

[16:34.58]This is how they have chosen

[16:36.12]to cope with the pain of neglect

[16:38.06]and emotional agony.

[16:40.11]In Britain,

[16:41.24]as many as 20% of families

[16:43.72]will only sit down

[16:45.29]and have dinner together once a year.

[16:46.96]Once a year!

[16:50.24]And what about the time-honored tradition

[16:52.37]of reading your kid a bedtime story?

[16:55.64]Research from the 1980s showed

[16:57.64]that children who are read to,

[16:59.51]had far greater literacy and significantly

[17:01.18]outperformed their peers at school.

[17:04.94]And yet, less than 33% of British children

[17:08.41]ages two to eight

[17:10.32]have a regular bedtime story read to them.

[17:14.57]You may not think much of that

[17:16.04]until you take into account

[17:17.77]that 75% of their parents

[17:21.27]DID have that bedtime story

[17:24.05]when they were that age.

[17:28.27]Clearly, we do not have to ask ourselves

[17:31.58]where all of this pain,

[17:32.64]anger andviolent behavior

[17:35.50]comes from.

[17:36.70]It is self-evident

[17:37.31]that children are thundering

[17:38.79]against the neglect,

[17:39.64]quaking against the indifference

[17:41.69]and crying out

[17:42.87]just to be noticed.

[17:45.11]The various child protection agencies

[17:47.54]in the US say that

[17:49.11]millions of children

[17:50.42]are victims of maltreatment

[17:52.69]in the form of neglect,

[17:54.68]in the average year.

[17:56.44]Yes, neglect.

[17:58.47]In rich homes,

[17:59.94]privileged homes,

[18:01.53]wired to the hilt

[18:02.96]with every electronic gadget.

[18:04.78]Homes where parents come home,

[18:06.50]but they're not really home,

[18:08.31]because their heads

[18:08.91]are still at the office.

[18:11.28]And their kids?

[18:13.07]Well, their kids

[18:14.46]just make do

[18:15.18]with whatever emotional

[18:16.58]crumbs they get.

[18:17.99]And you don't get much from endless TV,

[18:22.42]computer games and videos.

[18:23.84]These hard,

[18:24.77]cold numbers

[18:25.55]which for me,

[18:26.36]wrench the soul

[18:27.34]and shake the spirit,

[18:29.01]should indicate to you

[18:30.77]why I have devoted so much

[18:34.01]of my time and resources

[18:35.34]into making our new

[18:37.09]Heal the Kids initiative

[18:39.52]a colossal success.

[18:43.29]Our goal is simple

[18:45.17]to recreate the parent-child bond,

[18:49.88]to renew its promise

[18:51.81]and light the way forward

[18:53.23]for all the beautiful children

[18:55.17]who are destined one day

[18:56.71]to walk this earth.

[18:58.78]But since this is my first public lecture,

[19:01.28]and you have so warmly welcomed me

[19:03.47]into your hearts,

[19:04.65]I feel that I want to tell you more.

[19:07.43]We each have our own story,

[19:09.78]and in that sense statistics

[19:12.69]can become personal.

[19:17.04]They say that parenting

[19:18.31]is like dancing.

[19:19.37]You take one step,

[19:20.51]your child takes another.

[19:22.53]I have discovered

[19:23.36]that getting parents

[19:24.95]to re-dedicate themselves

[19:26.18]to their children

[19:27.26]is only half the story.

[19:29.18]The other half is

[19:30.40]preparing the children

[19:31.24]to re-accept their parents.

[19:33.97]When I was very young

[19:35.78]I remember that we had this crazy mutt

[19:38.17]I remember we had this crazy dog,

[19:39.84]it was a mutt dog

[19:40.90]named "Black Girl,"

[19:42.94]she was a mix of wolf and retriever.

[19:45.87]Not only wasn't she much of a guard dog,

[19:48.28]she was such a scared

[19:49.44]and nervous thing

[19:50.30]that it is a wonder she did not pass out

[19:52.34]every time a truck rumbled by,

[19:54.63]or a thunderstorm swept through Indiana.

[19:58.14]My sister Janet and I

[19:59.98]gave that dog so much love,

[20:02.53]but we never really won back

[20:03.76]the sense of trust

[20:05.34]that had been stolen

[20:06.47]by her previous owner.

[20:08.67]We knew he used to beat her.

[20:11.10]We didn't know with what.

[20:13.04]But whatever it was,

[20:14.82]it was enough to suck the spirit

[20:16.51]right out of that dog.

[20:18.83]A lot of kids today

[20:20.17]are hurt puppies

[20:22.89]who have weaned themselves

[20:24.28]off the need for love.

[20:27.18]They couldn't care less

[20:28.69]about their parents.

[20:30.08]Left to their own devices,

[20:31.70]they cherish their independence.

[20:34.05]They have moved on their life

[20:35.68]and have left their parents behind.

[20:38.05]Then there are the far worse cases

[20:40.74]of children who harbor animosity

[20:43.07]and resentment

[20:44.23]toward their parents,

[20:45.70]so that any overture

[20:47.27]that their parents might undertake

[20:49.06]would be thrown forcefully

[20:50.88]back in their face.

[20:52.05]Tonight,

[20:52.93]I don't want any of us

[20:54.52]to make this mistake.

[20:56.07]That's why I'm calling upon

[20:57.54]all the world's children

[20:59.80]beginning with all of us here tonight

[21:03.13]to forgive our parents,

[21:05.56]if we felt neglected,

[21:07.12]FORGIVE.

[21:08.30]Forgive them

[21:09.15]and teach them

[21:10.04]how to love again.

[21:13.45]You probably weren't surprised

[21:14.78]to hear

[21:15.64]that I did not have an idyllic childhood.

[21:18.39]The strain and tension

[21:20.28]that exists in my relationship

[21:21.65]with my own father

[21:23.37]is well documented.

[21:25.61]My father is a tough man

[21:28.12]and he pushed my brothers

[21:29.58]and me hard,

[21:30.61]really hard

[21:31.59]from the earliest age,

[21:32.96]for the best

[21:34.13]he wanted us to be the best performers

[21:36.42]we could possibly be.

[21:38.50]He had great difficulty showing affection.

[21:41.89]He never really told me he loved me.

[21:44.31]And he never really complimented me either.

[21:46.89]If I did a great show,

[21:48.61]he would tell me it was a good show.

[21:50.93]And if I did an OK show,

[21:58.49]he would say nothing.

[22:04.51]He seemed intent,

[22:06.35]above all else,

[22:08.35]I need a tissue, I'm sorry

[22:12.39]He seemed intent

[22:28.12]excuse me

[22:33.05]He seemed intent,

[22:36.39]above all else,

[22:38.41]on making us a commercial success.

[22:41.70]At that he was more than adept.

[22:44.98]My father was a managerial genius

[22:47.97]and my brothers and I

[22:50.10]owe our professional success,

[22:52.12]in no small measure,

[22:53.65]to the forceful way

[22:54.77]that he pushed us.

[22:56.76]He trained me as a showman

[22:58.64]and under his guidance

[22:59.86]I couldn't miss a step.

[23:02.56]But what I really wanted was a Dad.

[23:05.20]I wanted a father

[23:07.08]who showed me love.

[23:09.01]And my father never did that.

[23:11.43]He never said I love you

[23:12.85]while looking me straight in the eye.

[23:14.97]He never played a game with me.

[23:16.94]He never gave me a piggyback ride,

[23:19.26]he never threw a pillow at me,

[23:21.52]or a water balloon.

[23:23.74]But I remember

[23:25.16]once when I was about four years old,

[23:28.00]there was a little carnival

[23:29.67]and he picked me up

[23:31.95]and put me on a pony.

[23:33.72]It was a tiny gesture,

[23:36.40]probably something

[23:37.06]he forgot five minutes later.

[23:39.25]But because of that one moment

[23:42.11]I have this special place

[23:43.74]in my heart for him.

[23:45.36]Because that's how kids are,

[23:47.29]the little things mean so much.

[23:53.17]They mean so much.

[23:56.11]For me, that one moment

[23:57.32]meant everything.

[23:58.90]I only experienced it one time,

[24:01.18]but that one time made me

[24:02.75]feel really good,

[24:04.27]about him

[24:05.49]and about the world.

[24:08.16]But now I am a father myself,

[24:14.33]and one day

[24:16.54]I was thinking about my own children,

[24:18.71]Prince and Paris

[24:21.14]and how I wanted them to think of me

[24:23.01]when they grow up.

[24:24.30]To be sure,

[24:25.62]I would like them to remember

[24:26.91]how I always wanted them with me

[24:29.45]wherever I went,

[24:31.08]how I always tried to put them

[24:32.39]before everything else.

[24:34.46]But there are also challenges

[24:35.99]in their lives.

[24:36.86]Because my kids

[24:37.67]are stalked by paparazzi ,

[24:39.95]they can't always go to a park

[24:41.77]or to a movie with me.

[24:44.19]So what if they resent me

[24:47.20]when they grow older,

[24:48.70]and what if they resent

[24:49.62]how my choices impacted their youth?

[24:51.80]Why weren't we given an average childhood

[24:55.24]like all the other kids,

[24:56.35]they might ask?

[24:57.66]And at that moment

[24:58.67]I pray that my children

[24:59.94]will give me the benefit of the doubt.

[25:01.92]That they will say to themselves:

[25:03.89]Our daddy did the best he could,

[25:06.77]given the unique circumstances

[25:08.55]that he faced.

[25:10.53]He may not have been perfect,

[25:12.35]but he was a warm and decent man,

[25:14.66]who tried to give us

[25:15.29]all the love in the world.

[25:17.51]I hope that they will always focus

[25:18.98]on the positive things,

[25:20.56]on the saCRIfices

[25:22.17]I willingly made for them,

[25:23.95]and not CRIticise the things

[25:25.51]they had to give up,

[25:27.23]or the errors I've made,

[25:28.84]and will certainly continue to make,

[25:30.79]in raising them.

[25:32.35]For we have all been someone's child,

[25:34.58]and we know that

[25:36.05]despite the very best of plans and efforts,

[25:37.94]mistakes will always occur.

[25:40.03]That's just being human.

[25:41.74]And when I think about this,

[25:43.17]of how I hope that my children

[25:45.60]will not judge me unkindly,

[25:47.93]and will forgive me,

[25:49.19]forgive my shortcomings,

[25:51.07]I am forced to think of my own father

[25:53.51]and despite my earlier denials,

[25:55.94]I am forced to admit

[25:58.92]that he must have loved me.

[26:01.70]He did love me,

[26:04.28]and I know that.

[26:06.25]There were little things

[26:07.52]that showed it.

[26:08.93]When I was a kid

[26:10.36]I had a real sweet tooth

[26:13.38]we all did.

[26:15.61]My father

[26:21.04]he did try.

[26:23.77]But my favorite food

[26:26.09]to satisfy my sweet tooth

[26:27.92]was glazed doughnuts

[26:31.79]and my father knew that.

[26:33.35]So every few weeks

[26:34.57]I would come downstairs in the morning

[26:36.35]and there on the kitchen counter

[26:37.93]was a bag of glazed doughnuts

[26:39.81]no note, no explanation

[26:41.84]just the doughnuts.

[26:43.71]It was like Santa Claus.

[26:45.32]Sometimes I would think

[26:46.69]about staying up late at night,

[26:48.52]so I could see him leave them there,

[26:50.34]but just like with Santa Claus,

[26:52.48]I didn't want to ruin the magic

[26:54.82]for fear that he would never do it again.

[26:58.11]My father had to leave them secretly

[27:00.13]at night,

[27:01.47]so as no one might catch him

[27:03.30]with his guard down.

[27:04.91]He was scared of human emotion,

[27:06.93]he didn't understand it

[27:09.11]or know how to deal with it.

[27:10.83]But he did know doughnuts.

[27:16.91]And when I allow the floodgates

[27:17.86]to open up,

[27:19.14]there are other memories

[27:20.56]that come rushing back,

[27:22.12]memories of other tiny gestures,

[27:24.04]however imperfect,

[27:28.25]what he could.

[27:29.51]So tonight,

[27:30.42]rather than focusing on

[27:31.45]what my father did not do,

[27:32.25]I want to focus on

[27:33.22]all the things he did do

[27:34.55]and on his own personal challenges.

[27:36.62]I want to stop judging him.

[27:38.29]I have started reflecting on the fact

[27:41.37]that my father grew up in the South,

[27:46.24]in a very poor family.

[27:47.90]He came of age

[27:48.81]during the Depression

[27:50.22]and his own father,

[27:51.33]who struggled to feed his children,

[27:53.16]showed little affection

[27:54.58]towards his family

[27:56.10]and raised him.

[27:57.47]He raised my father

[27:59.62]and his siblings with an iron fist.

[28:02.81]Who could have imagined

[28:03.99]what it was like to grow up

[28:05.15]a poor black man in the South,

[28:07.39]robbed of dignity,

[28:08.86]bereft of hope,

[28:10.90]struggling to become a man

[28:12.27]in a world that saw my father

[28:14.19]as subordinate.

[28:16.06]I was the first black artist

[28:20.36]to be played on MTV

[28:23.55]and I remember how big a deal it was

[28:25.56]even then.

[28:26.84]And that was in the 1980s!

[28:31.34]My father moved to Indiana

[28:33.26]and had a large family of his own,

[28:35.59]working long hours

[28:36.61]in the steel mills,

[28:37.77]work that kills the lungs

[28:39.29]and humbles the spirit,

[28:41.13]all to support his family.

[28:44.72]Is it any wonder

[28:46.04]that he found it difficult

[28:47.22]to expose his feelings?

[28:49.09]Is it any mystery

[28:50.36]that he hardened his heart,

[28:52.20]that he raised the emotional ramparts?

[28:55.28]And most of all,

[28:56.97]is it any wonder

[28:58.28]why he pushed his sons

[28:59.69]so hard to succeed as performers

[29:03.03]so that they could be saved

[29:04.26]from what he knew

[29:05.57]to be a life of indignity and poverty

[29:10.57]I have begun to see

[29:11.63]that even my father's harshness

[29:13.36]was a kind of love,

[29:15.33]an imperfect love,

[29:16.49]to be sure,

[29:17.60]but love nonetheless.

[29:19.39]He pushed me because he loved me.

[29:24.24]Because he wanted no man

[29:26.33]ever to look down at his offspring.

[29:29.51]And now

[29:30.38]with time,

[29:31.04]rather than bitterness,

[29:32.45]I feel blessing.

[29:34.73]In the place of anger,

[29:36.27]I have found absolution.

[29:38.14]And in the place of revenge

[29:39.61] I have found reconciliation.

[29:41.73]And my initial fury

[29:43.86]has slowly given way to forgiveness.

[29:45.99]Almost a decade ago,

[29:47.75]I founded a children's charity

[29:49.77]called Heal the World.

[29:51.66]The title was something

[29:52.79]I felt inside me.

[29:54.51]Little did I know,

[29:55.53]as Shmuley later pointed out,

[29:57.10]that those two words

[29:58.56]form the cornerstone

[30:00.13]of Old Testament prophecy.

[30:02.45]Do I really believe

[30:03.57]that we can heal this world,

[30:05.31]that is riddled with war and genocide,

[30:08.29]even today?

[30:11.02]And do I really think

[30:12.49]that we can heal our children,

[30:13.95]the same children

[30:14.87]who as the papers reported

[30:16.24]this morning,

[30:18.11]can walk into a high school

[30:20.85]in San Diego

[30:22.16]and shoot down two beautiful students,

[30:25.04]just at the beginning of their lives?

[30:29.18]A horrifying reminder of the guns

[30:31.61]and hatred that shot

[30:33.08]through Columbine

[30:34.40]almost two years ago.

[30:36.94]Or children can beat

[30:39.78]a defenseless toddler to death,

[30:41.61]like the tragic story

[30:44.25]of Jamie Bulger?

[30:46.57]Of course I do.

[30:48.09]Of course I do,

[30:50.01]or I wouldn't be here tonight.

[30:52.09]But it all begins with forgiveness,

[30:54.83]because to heal the world,

[30:56.05]we first have to heal ourselves.

[30:58.93]And to heal the kids,

[31:00.30]we first have to heal the child within,

[31:03.13]each and every one of us.

[31:05.40]As an adult,

[31:07.58]and as a parent,

[31:08.90]I realize that I cannot be

[31:10.37]a whole human being,

[31:12.03]nor a parent capable

[31:13.46]of unconditional love,

[31:14.83]until I put to rest the

[31:17.91]ghosts of my own childhood.

[31:21.05]And that's what I'm asking all of us

[31:23.83]to do tonight.

[31:24.79]Live up to the fifth of the Ten Commandments,

[31:27.47]Honor your parents by not judging them.

[31:30.57]Give them the benefit of the doubt.

[31:33.45]That is why I want to

[31:35.47]forgive my father

[31:36.78]and to stop judging him.

[31:38.37]I want to forgive my father,

[31:40.09]because I want a father,

[31:42.77]and this is the only one that I've got.

[31:46.41]I want the weight of my past

[31:48.07]lifted from my shoulders

[31:49.85]and I want to be free

[31:51.61]to step into a new relationship

[31:53.15]with my father,

[31:54.42]for the rest of my life,

[31:56.25]unhindered by the goblins of the past.

[31:59.59]In a world filled with hate,

[32:01.86]we must still dare to hope.

[32:04.85]Keep hope alive.

[32:06.83]In a world filled with anger,

[32:08.71]we must still dare to comfort.

[32:12.46]In a world filled with despair,

[32:14.48]we must still dare to dream.

[32:17.11]And in a world filled with distrust,

[32:19.13]we must still dare to believe.

[32:22.57]To all of you tonight

[32:24.33]who feel let down by your parents,

[32:26.72]I ask you to let down your disappointment.

[32:31.37]To all of you tonight

[32:33.10]who feel cheated

[32:34.57]by your fathers or mothers,

[32:36.79]I ask you not to cheat yourself further.

[32:40.18]And to all of you

[32:41.39]who wish to push your parents away,

[32:43.20]I ask you to extend your hand

[32:45.23]to them instead.

[32:47.91]I am asking you,

[32:49.63]I am asking myself,

[32:51.45]to give our parents

[32:54.28]the gift of unconditional love,

[32:55.43]so that they too may learn

[32:57.24]how to love from us,

[32:59.02]their children.

[33:00.63]So that love will finally

[33:02.00]be restored to a desolate

[33:03.87]and lonely world.

[33:07.35]Shmuley once mentioned

[33:09.12]to me an ancient Biblical prophecy

[33:12.86]which says

[33:13.98]that a new world

[33:15.56]and a new time would come,

[33:17.32]when "the hearts of the parents

[33:18.81]would be restored

[33:20.01]through the hearts

[33:20.93]of their children".

[33:22.45]My friends,

[33:23.81]we are that world,

[33:26.40]we are those children.

[33:29.33]Mahatma Gandhi said,

[33:32.01]The weak can never forgive.

[33:35.20]Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.

[33:39.24]Tonight, be strong.

[33:41.05]Beyond being strong,

[33:42.98]rise to the greatest challenge of all

[33:44.55]to restore that broken covenant.

[33:47.98]We must all overcome

[33:49.51]whatever crippling effects

[33:51.02]our childhoods may

[33:52.15]have had on our lives

[33:53.66]and in the words of Jesse Jackson,

[33:55.49]forgive each other,

[33:57.16]redeem each other

[33:58.72]and move on.

[34:01.63]This call for forgiveness

[34:03.75]may not result in Oprah moments

[34:06.53]the world over,

[34:07.69]with thousands of children

[34:08.75]making up with their parents,

[34:10.53]but it will at least be a start,

[34:13.77]We'll all be so much happier

[34:15.54]as a result.

[34:17.11]And so ladies and gentlemen,

[34:19.43]I conclude my remarks tonight

[34:21.30]with faith,

[34:23.59]with joy

[34:25.21]and excitement.

[34:27.48]From this day forward,

[34:29.41]let a new song be heard.

[34:31.74]Let that new song

[34:32.35]be the sound of children laughing.

[34:35.45]Let that new song be the sound

[34:37.12]of children playing.

[34:39.24]Let that new song

[34:40.45]be the sound of children singing.

[34:43.13]And let that new song

[34:45.46]be the sound of parents listening.