[00:00.00]Part 2
[00:14.89]Unit 1 Education
[00:19.57]Basketball Player(M)
[00:22.62]Frank was the university's star basketball player,
[00:27.98]and he had to get his grades up
[00:31.63]in order to play in the big game at the end of the season
[00:36.28]His coach knew this was impossible without some rule-bending.
[00:42.34]So he arranged for the professors who were unhappy with Frank's work
[00:47.91]to create a special test for him
[00:51.85]They finally decided on a good,short quiz
[00:56.53]They brought Frank into an empty room that was filled with books,
[01:02.17]magazines,and a calculator
[01:05.93]They told him that he would have three hours,complete the one-question quiz
[01:12.31]He agreed,and they left the room.
[01:16.75]At the end of the three hours,they ask him for his answer
[01:22.10]He said,"Just a minute!I've almost got it!"
[01:27.46]After ten minutes of this,the professors finally yelled at him,
[01:32.71]"We need an answer now!How many seconds are there in a year?"they asked.
[01:39.87]And finally he replied,"12."
[01:44.72]"12?!"asked the professors.
[01:48.59]"Yeah,the second of January,the second of February,the second of March..."
[01:55.36]Final Exam(M)
[01:58.80]It was the final exam for a history course at the local university.
[02:06.75]The exam was two hours long,and exam booklets were provided
[02:15.50]The professor was very strict and told the class
[02:22.86]he would not accept any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours
[02:33.52]and the student would fail.
[02:37.78]A half hour into the exam,a student came rushing in
[02:45.43]and asked the professor for an exam booklet
[02:50.68]"You're got not going to have time to finish this,"
[02:55.75]the professor stated as he handed the student a booklet
[03:02.00]"Yes,I will,"replied the student.He then took a seat and began writing
[03:11.45]After two hours,the professor called for the exams,
[03:18.30]and the students handed them in,
[03:22.66]all except the late student,who was still writhing.A half hour later,
[03:31.12]the last student came up to the professor
[03:36.08]who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class.
[03:42.85]He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there
[03:51.18]"No,you don't.I'm not going to accept that.It's late,"the professor said.
[03:59.93]The student looked angry adn asked,"Do you know who I am?!"
[04:06.18]"No,as a matter of fact,I don't,"replied the professor.
[04:12.94]"Do you know who I am?!"the student asked again.
[04:18.87]"No,and I don't care,"replied teh professor with an air of superiority.
[04:27.83]"Good,"replied the student,who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams
[04:35.77]stuffed his in the middle,and walked out of the room.
[04:42.04]Unit 2 Food and Drink
[04:55.99]The Most Grief(M)
[04:59.65]A doctor was once talking to a large audience in New York.
[05:05.01]The material we put into our stomachs
[05:09.45]to enough to have killed most of us sitting here,years ago.Red meat is awful.
[05:17.02]Soft drink erode your stomach lining.
[05:20.97]Chinese food is loaded with soy sauce
[05:25.22]Vegetables have been polluted,
[05:28.70]and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water
[05:35.36]But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all
[05:39.91]and we all have eaten it or may eat it in the future
[05:44.76]Can anyoune here tell me what it is causes the most grief
[05:50.33]and suffering for years after eating it?"
[05:54.77]A 60-year-old woman in the front row stood up and said,"Wedding cake."
[06:01.33]Unit 3 Free-time Activities
[06:15.56]Going Swimming(E)
[06:18.93]David and Larry were teachers in the local high school
[06:24.08]One day,the weather was very hot,so they wanted to swim in the nearby lake
[06:31.34]They didn't bring their swimming-trunks
[06:36.07]but since they were all alone,they didn't care.
[06:41.14]They undressed and got into the water for a long,refredhing swim
[06:48.40]Refreshed,they were halfway back up the beach
[06:53.44]to the spot where they'd left their clothes
[06:57.59]when a group of students from the high school came along.
[07:02.56]Unable to get to their clothes in time David covered his privates
[07:09.82]and Larry covered his face while they ran for cover in the bushes
[07:15.88]After the strdents wandered on and the men got dressed again
[07:21.63]David asked Larry why he covered his face rather than his privates
[07:27.79]Larry replied,"I don't know about you,
[07:33.96]but it's my face they would recognize in the school."
[07:38.61]Taking Pictures(E)
[07:42.05]Mr.Livingston was a very rich businessman,
[07:47.10]and he had a strong interest in photography
[07:51.46]One day,he went to take pictures of a folld
[07:55.90]In order to get closer to the flooded area for better pictures
[08:01.07]he called his secretary to hire a plane for him
[08:05.80]"It will be waithing for you at the airport!"his secretary told him.
[08:11.83]As soon as he got to the small local airport,
[08:16.27]a plane was warming up near the runway
[08:20.32]He jumped in with his equipment and yelled,"Let's go!Let's go!"
[08:26.36]The plane took off,and soon they were in the air
[08:31.19]"Fly over the north side of the river,"said Mr.Livingston,
[08:36.02]"and make a few low level passese."
[08:39.97]"Why?"asked the pilot
[08:44.04]"Because I'm going to take pictures!I'm a photographer,
[08:48.77]and that's what I'm doing,taking pictures!"
[08:52.72]said Mr.Livingston with great impatience
[08:56.97]After a long pause,the pilot said,"You mean you're not the instructor?"
[09:04.05]Unit 4 Health and Body Care
[09:18.21]Hearing(E)
[09:20.67]Mr.Johnson was over 70 years old and had serious hearing problems for a long time
[09:28.14]He went to the doctor,
[09:31.19]and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids
[09:36.84]that allowed him to hear 100%
[09:41.09]Mr.Johnson went back to the doctor in a month,and teh doctor said,
[09:47.05]"Your hearing is perfect.
[09:50.50]Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again."
[09:55.23]Mr.Johnson replied,"Oh,I haven't told my family yet.
[10:01.29]I just sit around and listen to their conversations.
[10:06.15]I've changed my will several times!"
[10:10.12]Don't Cough(E)
[10:13.07]Outside a chemist,a man is holding onto a pole
[10:18.63]not breathing,not moving,just standing there
[10:24.09]Seeing this strange sight in front of his shop
[10:29.05]the chemist goes up to his assistant and asks,
[10:33.50]"what's the matter with that guy?Wasn't he in here earlier?"
[10:39.87]The assistant replies,"Yes,he was.
[10:38.87]He had the most terrible cough and none of our cough medicines seemed to help."
[10:44.62]The chemist says,"He seems to be fine now."
[10:49.79]The assistant replies,"Sure,he does.
[10:55.35]I gave him a box of the strongest laxatives on the market
[11:00.63]Now he won't dare to cough!"
[11:04.29]A Facelift(E)
[11:07.34]A man decides to have a facelift for his birthday
[11:13.09]He spends $4,000and feels really good about the result good about the result.
[11:19.65]On his way home he goes into a bookstore and buys a book on how to stay young.
[11:26.13]Before leaving he says to the clerk,
[11:29.78]"I hope you don't mind my asking,but how old do you think I am ?"
[11:35.35]"About 35"was the reply.
[11:39.19]"I'm actually 47 years old,"the man says,feeling really happy.
[11:45.35]After that goes into a coffee shop to celebrate
[11:50.42]Before leaving,he asks the same question.
[11:55.57]The clerk replies,"Oh,you look about 29"This makes him feel really good.
[12:03.43]While standing at the bus stop he asks a lady the same question.
[12:08.78]"There is a sure way of telling a man's age
[12:14.43]If I read your palm,I'll be be able to tell your exact age
[12:19.70]The man gives the lady his hand,
[12:23.36]and seconds later she says,"You are 47 years old."
[12:29.32]"That was brilliant.How did you do that?"the man asks.
[12:34.46]The lady replies,"I was behind you in the bookstore."