Signs of egotism:
自負的跡象
?Frequent complaining
?經(jīng)常抱怨
Egotists find any and everything to complain about when things start to go wrong, when they should really be using that energy to right the ship. These people tend to blame others for a team’s shortcomings, rather than look at what they can do better, or what they can do to help others grow.
當事情開始出錯,他們應該真正地把精力放在正確的地方的時候,自負者卻在找尋找一切事情去抱怨。這些人往往把團隊的問題歸咎于別人,而不是看看有什么他們可以做得更好的,或者他們可以做些什么來幫助別人成長。
?Frequent arguing
?頻繁爭吵
Since they tend to place blame on others, egotists are often very confrontational. This leads to rifts between colleagues and coworkers, ultimately impeding any progress for all parties involved.
因為他們往往把責任歸咎于別人,自負者經(jīng)常咄咄逼人。這導致了他們和同事、合作人之間的關系產(chǎn)生裂痕,最終阻礙了涉及各方的任何進展。
?Defensive behavior
?辯護行為
Egotists are quick to blame everyone else, but somehow always have a reason for why they didn’t perform well on a task. When others mess up, they’re incompetent; when they mess up, it’s because they didn’t sleep well, or have a lot on their plate. They often don’t listen to constructive criticism, believing their supervisor is simply out to get them. Obviously, this attitude completely impedes their ability to improve.
自負者輕易責備他人,但自己卻總有一些理由解釋為什么他們工作沒有做好。當別人把事情搞糟時,他們就是無能的。當他們把事情搞糟時,就是由于他們沒睡好,或者有許多事要處理。他們經(jīng)常不聽有益的批評,認為他們的主管就是要教訓他。很明顯,這種能力完全阻礙了他們能力的提高。
?Self-criticism
?自我評價
Behind closed doors, egotists are incredibly critical of themselves. They are afraid of taking risks or stepping out of their comfort zones because they fear being laughed at. This stems from the notion that they actually think anyone else truly cares enough to judge them. Egotists also believe that others think this way simply because that’s how they operate themselves.
關起門來,自負者自己評價自己。他們害怕冒險或者離開他們覺得舒服的地方,因為他們害怕被嘲笑。這源于他們認為別人都很想評價他們的觀念。自負者還相信別人也是這么認為的,因為他們自己也是這么做的。
?No apologies
?從不道歉
Why would an egotist apologize? In their eyes, they never do any wrong. This goes back to how they often blame others for their own mistakes or shortcomings, and how they rationalize their own behavior. When someone wrongs them, they’ll hold a grudge until the other party apologizes. When they wrong others, they believe the other party should just let it go.
自負者怎么會道歉呢?在他們眼里,他們從不犯錯。這可以追溯到為他們自己的錯誤和缺點他們怎么經(jīng)常責備別人,怎樣自圓其說他們的行為。當別人觸怒了他們,他們會記仇直到別人道歉。當他們觸怒別人時,他們相信別人不應該計較這件事。
?Impatience
?不耐煩
Egotists are rather impatient when it takes others a little longer to learn something or complete a task. They think they’re more intelligent and efficient than everyone else in the room, so they get frustrated when someone else takes their time doing something. They don’t take the time to consider other people’s thought processes or abilities. Rather than help others, they simply complain about how long it’s taking them to get a job done.
當別人多花了一點兒時間來學習某些事情或者完成一項任務時,自負者會相當不耐煩。他們認為他們比屋內(nèi)別的每一個人都更聰明,更有效率。他們不會花時間去考慮別人的思維過程或能力。他們只是抱怨完成這份工作花了多長時間,而不是去幫助別人。
?Passing judgment
?短暫的判斷
Obviously, egotists are incredibly judgmental. They don’t consider other people’s background, personal life, or any other factor when analyzing their ability to perform a specific task. When others fail, egotists don’t see them as a work in progress; they simply see them as a failure.
很明顯,自負者很挑剔。在分析別人執(zhí)行一項具體工作的能力時,他們不會考慮別人的背景、私人生活,或者任何別的因素。當別人失敗時,自負者不會看到別人工作中的進展,只是把他們看作失敗者。
Ways to overcome egotism
克服自負的方法
You might not even realize you’re acting in a way that comes of as egotistical. If any of the preceding characteristics apply to you, you should take action in order to become a more compassionate, team-driven individual.
你可能甚至沒有意識到你的行事方式是自負的。如果你符合前面的任何一個特征,你應該采取行動來成為一個更有同情心,更有團隊驅(qū)動力的人。
?Help others instead of putting them down
?幫助別人而不是說別人壞話
Don’t waste time and energy complaining about how terrible others are at their jobs. If you’re so much better than them, it should be easy to help them improve. Share the strategies you’ve used to move forward in life. Your colleagues will most likely appreciate your efforts, and your team will move toward success.
不要把時間精力浪費在抱怨別人在工作上多么糟糕上。如果你比他們好得多,那么你很容易幫助他們提升自己。分享你生活中用來前進的方法。你的同事很可能欣賞你的努力,而你的團隊也會走向成功。
?Use criticism wisely
?明智地使用批評
When helping others, point out the things they do well. Although they probably have areas in need of improvement pertaining to their performance, don’t harp on them. Instead, guide them toward growth. Nobody likes a critic, so if you’re going to criticize others, make sure it’s for a positive reason.
當幫助別人時,指出他們做得好的事情。盡管他們的工作有需要提高的地方,但不要喋喋不休。相反,指導他們進步。沒有人喜歡被批評,所以假如你打算批評別人,確保這是為了一個積極的原因。
?Only judge yourself
?只評判自己
You should never, ever judge anyone other than yourself. Don’t compare other people’s performance to your own because you have no idea about any other aspect of their life, and have never walked in their shoes. Compare yourself only to the person you were yesterday. If you haven’t made improvements yourself, you have no right to judge anyone else.
你應該永遠不曾評判別人而是自己。不要拿別人的表現(xiàn)和你自己比較,因為你不知道別人生活中別的任何方面,也不曾設身處地為他們著想。只和昨天的你比較。如果你沒有提升自己,你就沒權利評判別的任何人。