過(guò)節(jié)第一次帶對(duì)象回家 這些小心機(jī)讓你避免尷尬

過(guò)節(jié)帶新男友或新女友回家介紹給家人認(rèn)識(shí)，你的心情一定是既激動(dòng)又忐忑。怎樣才能在愉快舒適的氣氛中度過(guò)這一重要時(shí)刻，讓雙方給彼此都留下好印象呢?情感專家蘇珊·溫特給你總結(jié)了7條“金科玉律”。

先征得家人的同意

If you're bringing a significant other home, you'll need to run it by your family and make sure they're on board.

如果你要把另一半帶回家，你需要先知會(huì)家人，征得他們的同意。

"You need to have a preparatory conversation with your family," said Winter. "Tell them that you're seeing someone special and you'd like to integrate them into the holiday plans."

溫特說(shuō)：“你需要先和家人談一談，讓他們做好心理準(zhǔn)備。告訴他們，你戀愛(ài)了，并打算帶戀人回家過(guò)節(jié)。”

提前把各位親戚的特點(diǎn)和節(jié)日活動(dòng)告知另一半

Every family has its quirks and kooky relatives that join in on holiday celebrations. Give your partner an idea of who will be there and the protocol for their behavior, and highlight relatives that you think they'd get along with.

每個(gè)家庭的節(jié)日慶祝活動(dòng)都會(huì)有幾個(gè)古怪的親戚來(lái)參加。讓你的伴侶知道哪些親戚會(huì)來(lái)，他們的言行舉止大概是什么樣子，并重點(diǎn)介紹幾位你覺(jué)得能和伴侶合得來(lái)的親戚。

"Give them a 'what's up' as to each person and tell them the conversations to avoid and the conversations they might want to enter," said Winter.

溫特說(shuō)：“給每個(gè)親戚都做一個(gè)簡(jiǎn)介，告訴伴侶什么話應(yīng)該說(shuō)，什么話不應(yīng)該說(shuō)。”

kooky['k?ki]: adj. 乖僻的

提前做好過(guò)夜的安排

Even if you and your partner spend the night at each other's places all the time, your family's standards can be a different story, making sleeping arrangements a potentially fraught topic. Winter recommends treading carefully.

即使你和伴侶經(jīng)常在對(duì)方的住所里過(guò)夜，但是在父母家里過(guò)夜則是另一回事，可能會(huì)帶來(lái)一些煩惱。溫特建議對(duì)這件事要小心斟酌。

"This depends on how close you are to your parents and how open-minded they are," she said. "You don't have to stay with the family. You can stay in a hotel. You're adults. If you do stay in the home, you know your parents well enough — know the ground rules and don't push it."

“這取決于你和你父母的關(guān)系有多親近，以及他們有多開(kāi)明。”她說(shuō)，“你不必非得在家里過(guò)夜。你們可以住酒店。你們是成年人了。如果你真的在家過(guò)夜，你應(yīng)該很了解你的父母——知道他們的底線，并且不要逾越。”

fraught[fr?t]: adj. 擔(dān)心的，憂慮的

把伴侶不吃的東西告訴掌勺的人

The holidays center around food, so make sure your partner doesn't go hungry. If they keep kosher, have allergies, are vegetarian or vegan, or have other dietary restrictions, whoever is cooking needs to know that in advance.

節(jié)日聚會(huì)都是圍繞著吃展開(kāi)的，所以要確保你的伴侶不會(huì)餓肚子。如果他們吃潔食，對(duì)某些食物過(guò)敏，是素食者，或有其他飲食禁忌，都要提前告訴做飯的人。

Winter also suggests bringing food with you that you know your partner can have to make it easier on everyone.

溫特還建議你帶一些伴侶能吃的食物回家，這樣大家都比較省事。

kosher['ko??]: adj. 符合猶太教教規(guī)的，干凈的

選擇好要參加的家庭活動(dòng)

You probably have a good idea of what the holidays with your family are like. Set yourself and your partner up for success by choosing the parts of the celebrations that will be the least intimidating and the most enjoyable.

你很可能對(duì)自家的節(jié)日活動(dòng)了如指掌。選擇最沒(méi)有挑戰(zhàn)性、最有趣的慶?；顒?dòng)，讓你和伴侶可以成功搞定。

If baking holiday cookies or decorating the tree before Christmas are fun family affairs, include them.

如果烤節(jié)日餅干或裝飾圣誕樹(shù)是最有趣的，那么就參加這些家庭活動(dòng)。

談話時(shí)避開(kāi)有爭(zhēng)議性的話題

You want your family to get to know your partner and vice versa. But if your partner's political views differ from your family's, now is not the time to hash it out.

你想讓家人和另一半互相了解。但如果伴侶的政治觀點(diǎn)和你的家人相左，這可不是爭(zhēng)個(gè)是非黑白的時(shí)候。

"You're meeting parents and family for the first time, you want to give a good impression," said Winter. "Now is not the time to air your political views, especially if they'll be in opposition to this family. No good can come of it."

溫特說(shuō)：“這是第一次見(jiàn)對(duì)方的父母家人，你肯定想留下好印象?，F(xiàn)在不是發(fā)表政治觀點(diǎn)的時(shí)候，尤其在你的政治觀點(diǎn)和這家人相反的情況下。不會(huì)有什么好結(jié)果。”

hash out: 消除，經(jīng)過(guò)長(zhǎng)時(shí)間討論解決一個(gè)問(wèn)題

給自己和伴侶留點(diǎn)獨(dú)處時(shí)間

Meeting a partner's family can be overwhelming. Introducing your partner to your family can be stressful. And spending lots of time around relatives during the holidays can be a lot to handle regardless.

見(jiàn)伴侶的家人可能會(huì)讓你抓狂。將伴侶介紹給家人也可能讓你壓力重重。此外，節(jié)日期間和親戚們一起待那么長(zhǎng)時(shí)間應(yīng)該也不容易應(yīng)對(duì)。

Winter recommends factoring in some time and space to breathe during your visit, even if it's just a walk around the block or a coffee run.

溫特建議，在拜訪家人期間，給自己和伴侶留出一些獨(dú)處時(shí)間，即使只是在街區(qū)散散步或出去買咖啡也是好的。

She said: "Keep in mind that your partner is having a new experience. Have your partner keep in mind that you're having a new experience. Just because it's the holidays, you don't have to spend the entirety of the time with your family."

她說(shuō)：“要記住，這對(duì)你的伴侶來(lái)說(shuō)是第一次。你的伴侶也要明白，這對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)也是第一次。雖說(shuō)是過(guò)節(jié)，你們也不用時(shí)時(shí)刻刻都和家人待在一起。”

factor in: 將……納入;包括，把……計(jì)算在內(nèi)