The calendar at Melchester had been light, occupying the court only a few hours; and the assizes at Casterbridge, the next county-town on the Western Circuit, having no business for Raye, he had not gone thither. At the next town after that they did not open till the following Monday, trials to begin on Tuesday morning. In the natural order of things Raye would have arrived at the latter place on Monday afternoon; but it was not till the middle of Wednesday that his gown and grey wig, curled in tiers, in the best fashion of Assyrian bas-reliefs, were seen blowing and bobbing behind him as he hastily walked up the High Street from his lodgings. But though he entered the assize building there was nothing for him to do, and sitting at the blue baize table in the well of the court, he mended pens with a mind far away from the case in progress. Thoughts of unpremeditated conduct, of which a week earlier he would not have believed himself capable, threw him into a mood of dissatisfied depression.
He had contrived to see again the pretty rural maiden Anna, the day after the fair, had walked out of the city with her to the earthworks of Old Melchester, and feeling a violent fancy for her, had remained in Melchester all Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday; by persuasion obtaining walks and meetings with the girl six or seven times during the interval; had in brief won her, body and soul.
He supposed it must have been owing to the seclusion in which he had lived of late in town that he had given way so unrestrainedly to a passion for an artless creature whose inexperience had, from the first, led her to place herself unreservedly in his hands. Much he deplored trifling with her feelings for the sake of a passing desire; and he could only hope that she might not live to suffer on his account.
She had begged him to come to her again; entreated him; wept. He had promised that he would do so, and he meant to carry out that promise. He could not desert her now. Awkward as such unintentional connections were, the interspace of a hundred miles—which to a girl of her limited capabilities was like a thousand—would effectually hinder this summer fancy from greatly encumbering his life; while thought of her simple love might do him the negative good of keeping him from idle pleasures in town when he wished to work hard. His circuit journeys would take him to Melchester three or four times a year; and then he could always see her.
The pseudonym, or rather partial name, that he had given her as his before knowing how far the acquaintance was going to carry him, had been spoken on the spur of the moment, without any ulterior intention whatever. He had not afterwards disturbed Anna's error, but on leaving her he had felt bound to give her an address at a stationer's not far from his chambers, at which she might write to him under the initials “C. B.”
In due time Raye returned to his London abode, having called at Melchester on his way and spent a few additional hours with his fascinating child of nature. In town he lived monotonously every day. Often he and his rooms were enclosed by a tawny fog from all the world besides, and when he lighted the gas to read or write by, his situation seemed so unnatural that he would look into the fire and think of that trusting girl at Melchester again and again. Often, oppressed by absurd fondness for her, he would enter the dim religious nave of the Law Courts by the north door, elbow other juniors habited like himself, and like him unretained; edge himself into this or that crowded court where a sensational case was going on, just as if he were in it, though the police officers at the door knew as well as he knew himself that he had no more concern with the business in hand than the patient idlers at the gallerydoor outside, who had waited to enter since eight in the morning because, like him, they belonged to the classes that live on expectation. But he would do these things to no purpose, and think how greatly the characters in such scenes contrasted with the pink and breezy Anna.
An unexpected feature in that peasant maiden's conduct was that she had not as yet written to him, though he had told her she might do so if she wished. Surely a young creature had never before been so reticent in such circumstances. At length he sent her a brief line, positively requesting her to write. There was no answer by the return post, but the day after a letter in a neat feminine hand, and bearing the Melchester postmark, was handed to him by the stationer.
The fact alone of its arrival was sufficient to satisfy his imaginative sentiment. He was not anxious to open the epistle, and in truth did not begin to read it for nearly half-an-hour, anticipating readily its terms of passionate retrospect and tender adjuration. When at last he turned his feet to the fireplace and unfolded the sheet, he was surprised and pleased to find that neither extravagance nor vulgarity was there. It was the most charming little missive he had ever received from woman. To be sure the language was simple and the ideas were slight; but it was so selfpossessed; so purely that of a young girl who felt her womanhood to be enough for her dignity that he read it through twice. Four sides were filled, and a few lines written across, after the fashion of former days; the paper, too, was common, and not of the latest shade and surface. But what of those things? He had received letters from women who were fairly called ladies, but never so sensible, so human a letter as this. He could not single out any one sentence and say it was at all remarkable or clever; the ensemble of the letter it was which won him; and beyond the one request that he would write or come to her again soon there was nothing to show her sense of a claim upon him.
To write again and develop a correspondence was the last thing Raye would have preconceived as his conduct in such a situation; yet he did send a short, encouraging line or two, signed with his pseudonym, in which he asked for another letter, and cheeringly promised that he would try to see her again on some near day, and would never forget how much they had been to each other during their short acquaintance.
梅爾切斯特的日程安排很輕松,雷伊只需要出庭幾個小時;巡回法庭的下一個開庭市鎮(zhèn)在卡斯特橋,那兒沒什么工作需要雷伊做,所以他也就沒過去。而再下一個市鎮(zhèn)要等到下禮拜一才開庭,審判則要等到禮拜二早上。因此正常情況下雷伊應(yīng)該在禮拜一下午到達(dá)后一個小鎮(zhèn);不過事實上直到禮拜三中午他才急匆匆從住處向市鎮(zhèn)正街走去,身后隨風(fēng)飛舞擺動的除了他的律師長袍,還有按照最時新的亞述淺浮雕樣式做成的層疊鬈曲的銀色假發(fā)。他雖然進(jìn)了巡回法庭大廳,但其實卻無事可做,便坐在鋪著藍(lán)色粗呢臺面的桌子后的律師席上,一邊削筆,一邊想著跟眼前的案子毫無關(guān)系的事情。他做了一件始料未及的事——一個星期以前他都不敢相信自己會做出這樣的事——想到這兒,他陷入了一種不滿與消沉的情緒中。
在集市后第二天,他又設(shè)法見到了那位漂亮的鄉(xiāng)下少女安娜,并陪她一起出城去參觀了舊梅爾切斯特遺址;他對她產(chǎn)生了遏制不住的迷戀,于是整個禮拜天、禮拜一和禮拜二都逗留在梅爾切斯特;在此期間一共哄勸姑娘跟他見面、散步了六七次;在這短短的時間內(nèi)便得到了她——從身體到心靈。
他猜想大概是因為最近自己在城里獨自一人生活太久,才會輕易被激情左右,放縱自己如此對待一個淳樸少女,而她因為涉世未深,一開始就毫無保留地交付自己任由他擺布。他深悔不該因為一時的情欲玩弄她的感情;現(xiàn)在只能希望她不會因為他而一生受苦。
她懇請他再回去看她,苦苦哀求、泣不成聲。他答應(yīng)了她,也打算履行諾言。他不能現(xiàn)在就拋棄她。雖然這種意料之外的交往是有些棘手,但好在兩人隔著一百英里——對她這樣能力有限的女孩來說就跟隔了一千英里一般——能夠有效地避免這段夏日熱戀太過影響他的生活;而且當(dāng)他想勤奮工作的時候,思及她那淳樸的愛,也許能有些反面的好處,讓他不必去城里瞎晃找樂子。巡回法庭的工作讓他每年有三到四次機會去梅爾切斯特,那個時候他盡可以去看望她。
一開始他并不知道兩人這段關(guān)系會發(fā)展到多深,所以當(dāng)時情急之下告訴她的是自己的化名,或者說是不完整的名字,倒不是存心要欺騙她。他后來也沒有費心跟安娜糾正這個錯誤,但在離開前他覺得有必要給她留個通訊地址——離他辦公室不遠(yuǎn)的一家文具店,她可以寫信寄到那里,收信人就用他名字的縮寫“查·布”就可以了。
雷伊按計劃返回了倫敦住所,返程途中又經(jīng)過梅爾切斯特,特意逗留了幾個小時,和他迷人的自然之子在一起。回城后他每天過著單調(diào)的生活。他和辦事處的各個房間大多數(shù)時候都被黃褐色的煙霧包圍,與外界隔絕開來;等他點亮汽油燈讀書寫字時,他總覺得自己身處奇境之中,不由得望著燈上的火焰,翻來覆去想的都是梅爾切斯特的那位輕信了他的姑娘。他時常因為瘋狂地思念她而倍感郁悶,便從北門走進(jìn)法院大樓那昏暗肅穆的正廳,擠到其他跟他一樣穿著打扮,一樣尚未受聘的初級律師中間去;或者擠進(jìn)這個或那個人頭攢動的法庭,里面正在審理一樁轟動一時的案子,就好像他跟這案子有關(guān)一樣,雖然守在門口的警官和他自己都心知肚明他與這案子毫無瓜葛,就跟站在旁聽席門外耐心等候的那些閑人一樣;他們早上八點就守在門外等著進(jìn)來,因為他們跟他一樣,都屬于一個在等候中打發(fā)時光的階層。但是他無論怎么做都是徒勞,于是不禁思量,這種場合里的這些人同粉粉嫩嫩、活潑可愛的安娜比起來多么迥異啊。
出乎他意料的是這個農(nóng)家姑娘到現(xiàn)在還沒給他來信,雖然他告訴過她想寫就盡管寫。很顯然處于這種狀態(tài)中的年輕女子不應(yīng)該會這樣按兵不動的。最后他給她寫了寥寥數(shù)語的短信,直言希望她寫信來。回來的郵車沒有帶來回信,不過一天以后文具店主交給他一封信,上面蓋著梅爾切斯特的郵戳,信封上是一個女性娟秀的筆跡。
有信件來這件事本身就已經(jīng)足夠讓想象力豐富的他感到滿足了。他沒有急著拆開,事實上他過了近半小時才展信閱讀,預(yù)計信里肯定滿是些熱切的回憶和溫婉的懇請。然而等到他走到壁爐邊打開信紙,發(fā)現(xiàn)信里既沒有夸張的情感也沒有鄙俗的言辭時,他大為訝異又十分欣喜。這是他收到過的女性來信中最令人心動的一封。是的,信里的語言簡單平實,思想也無足輕重;然而它是這般沉著自信,只有為自己身為女子感到矜持自尊的年輕女孩才能寫得出來;他從頭到尾看了兩遍。信寫了整整四頁紙,還有幾行是照著已過時的習(xí)慣橫過來交叉寫的;[6]信紙也非常普通,底色和表面都不時新。不過這又有什么關(guān)系呢?他從前也收到過一些完全稱得上是大家閨秀的女子的來信,但是統(tǒng)統(tǒng)都沒有像這一封這般通曉事理又富有人情味。他挑不出一句話,說它不同尋常機智過人,所以只能說這封信“渾然一體”贏得了他的心;除了請他再給她寫信以及早點來看她之外,沒有只言片語表明她認(rèn)為自己對他有權(quán)提出要求。
在這種情況下再給她寫信并建立起長期通信關(guān)系是雷伊事前萬萬沒有想到的;然而他真的又回了一封短信,寫了幾句鼓勵的話語,簽上自己的化名,還讓她繼續(xù)來信,并興沖沖地保證他近期內(nèi)會設(shè)法再去看望她,以及他永遠(yuǎn)也不會忘記他們相識雖短卻情深意濃的愛情。
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