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雙語·魔法師的外甥 第六章 安德魯舅舅的麻煩開始了

所屬教程:譯林版·魔法師的外甥

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2022年04月25日

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“Let go! Let go!” screamed Polly.

“I’m not touching you!” said Digory.

Then their heads came out of the pool and, once more, the sunny quietness of the Wood between the Worlds was all about them, and it seemed richer and warmer and more peaceful than ever after the staleness and ruin of the place they had just left. I think that, if they had been given the chance, they would again have forgotten who they were and where they came from and would have lain down and enjoyed themselves, half asleep, listening to the growing of the trees. But this time there was something that kept them as wide-awake as possible: for as soon as they had got out on to the grass, they found that they were not alone. The Queen, or the Witch (whichever you like to call her) had come up with them, holding on fast by Polly’s hair. That was why Polly had been shouting out “Let go!”

This proved, by the way, another thing about the rings which Uncle Andrew hadn’t told Digory because he didn’t know it himself. In order to jump from world to world by using one of those rings you don’t need to be wearing or touching it yourself; it is enough if you are touching someone who is touching it. In that way they work like a magnet; and everyone knows that if you pick up a pin with a magnet, any other pin which is touching the first pin will come too.

Now that you saw her in the wood, Queen Jadis looked different. She was much paler than she had been; so pale that hardly any of her beauty was left. And she was stooped and seemed to be finding it hard to breathe, as if the air of that place stifled her. Neither of the children felt in the least afraid of her now.

“Let go! Let go of my hair,” said Polly. “What do you mean by it?”

“Here! Let go of her hair. At once,” said Digory.

They both turned and struggled with her. They were stronger than she and in a few seconds they had forced her to let go. She reeled back, panting, and there was a look of terror in her eyes.

“Quick, Digory!” said Polly. “Change rings and into the home pool.”

“Help! Help! Mercy!” cried the Witch in a faint voice, staggering after them. “Take me with you. You cannot mean to leave me in this horrible place. It is killing me.”

“It’s a reason of State,” said Polly spitefully. “Like when you killed all those people in your own world. Do be quick, Digory.” They had put on their green rings, but Digory said:

“Oh bother! What are we to do?” He couldn’t help feeling a little sorry for the Queen.

“Oh don’t be such an ass,” said Polly. “Ten to one she’s only shamming. Do come on.” And then both children plunged into the home pool. “It’s a good thing we made that mark,” thought Polly. But as they jumped Digory felt that a large cold finger and thumb had caught him by the ear. And as they sank down and the confused shapes of our own world began to appear, the grip of that finger and thumb grew stronger. The Witch was apparently recovering her strength. Digory struggled and kicked, but it was not of the least use. In a moment they found themselves in Uncle Andrew’s study; and there was Uncle Andrew himself, staring at the wonderful creature that Digory had brought back from beyond the world.

And well he might stare. Digory and Polly stared too. There was no doubt that the Witch had got over her faintness; and now that one saw her in our own world, with ordinary things around her, she fairly took one’s breath away. In Charn she had been alarming enough; in London, she was terrifying. For one thing, they had not realized till now how very big she was. “Hardly human” was what Digory thought when he looked at her; and he may have been right, for some say there is giantish blood in the royal family of Charn. But even her height was nothing compared with her beauty, her fierceness, and her wildness. She looked ten times more alive than most of the people one meets in London. Uncle Andrew was bowing and rubbing his hands and looking, to tell the truth, extremely frightened. He seemed a little shrimp of a creature beside the Witch. And yet, as Polly said afterward, there was a sort of likeness between her face and his, something in the expression. It was the look that all wicked Magicians have, the “Mark” which Jadis had said she could not find in Digory’s face. One good thing about seeing the two together was that you would never again be afraid of Uncle Andrew, any more than you’d be afraid of a worm after you had met a rattlesnake or afraid of a cow after you had met a mad bull.

“Pooh!” thought Digory to himself. “Him a Magician! Not much. Now she’s the real thing.”

Uncle Andrew kept on rubbing his hands and bowing. He was trying to say something very polite, but his mouth had gone all dry so that he could not speak. His “experiment” with the rings, as he called it, was turning out more successful than he liked: for though he had dabbled in Magic for years he had always left all the dangers (as far as one can) to other people. Nothing at all like this had ever happened to him before.

Then Jadis spoke; not very loud, but there was something in her voice that made the whole room quiver.

“Where is the Magician who has called me into this world?”

“Ah—ah—Madam,” gasped Uncle Andrew, “I am most honoured—highly gratified—a most unexpected pleasure—if only I had had the opportunity of making any preparations—I—I—”

“Where is the Magician, Fool?” said Jadis.

“I—I am, Madam. I hope you will excuse any—er—liberty these naughty children may have taken. I assure you, there was no intention—”

“You?” said the Queen in a still more terrible voice. Then, in one stride, she crossed the room, seized a great handful of Uncle Andrew’s grey hair and pulled his head back so that his face looked up into hers. Then she studied his face as she had studied Digory’s face in the palace of Charn. He blinked and licked his lips nervously all the time. At last she let him go: so suddenly that he reeled back against the wall.

“I see,” she said scornfully, “you are a Magician—of a sort. Stand up, dog, and don’t sprawl there as if you were speaking to your equals. How do you come to know Magic? You are not of royal blood, I’ll swear.”

“Well—ah—not perhaps in the strict sense,” stammered Uncle Andrew. “Not exactly royal, Ma’am. The Ketterleys are, however, a very old family. An old Dorsetshire family, Ma’am.”

“Peace,” said the Witch. “I see what you are. You are a little, peddling Magician who works by rules and books. There is no real Magic in your blood and heart. Your kind was made an end of in my world a thousand years ago. But here I shall allow you to be my servant.”

“I should be most happy—delighted to be of any service—a p-pleasure, I assure you.”

“Peace! You talk far too much. Listen to your first task. I see we are in a large city. Procure for me at once a chariot or a flying carpet or a well-trained dragon, or whatever is usual for royal and noble persons in your land. Then bring me to places where I can get clothes and jewels and slaves fit for my rank. Tomorrow I will begin the conquest of the world.”

“I—I—I’ll go and order a cab at once,” gasped Uncle Andrew.

“Stop,” said the Witch, just as he reached the door. “Do not dream of treachery. My eyes can see through walls and into the minds of men. They will be on you wherever you go. At the first sign of disobedience I will lay such spells on you that anything you sit down on will feel like red hot iron and whenever you lie in a bed there will be invisible blocks of ice at your feet. Now go.”

The old man went out, looking like a dog with its tail between its legs.

The children were now afraid that Jadis would have something to say to them about what had happened in the wood. As it turned out, however, she never mentioned it either then or afterwards. I think (and Digory thinks too) that her mind was of a sort which cannot remember that quiet place at all, and however often you took her there and however long you left her there, she would still know nothing about it. Now that she was left alone with the children, she took no notice of either of them. And that was like her too. In Charn she had taken no notice of Pony (till the very end) because Digory was the one she wanted to make use of. Now that she had Uncle Andrew, she took no notice of Digory. I expect most witches are like that. They are not interested in things or people unless they can use them; they are terribly practical. So there was silence in the room for a minute or two. But you could tell by the way Jadis tapped her foot on the floor that she was growing impatient.

Presently she said, as if to herself, “What is the old fool doing? I should have brought a whip.” She stalked out of the room in pursuit of Uncle Andrew without one glance at the children.

“Whew!” said Polly, letting out a long breath of relief. “And now I must get home. It’s frightfully late. I shall catch it.”

“Well do, do come back as soon as you can,” said Digory. “This is simply ghastly, having her here. We must make some sort of plan.”

“That’s up to your Uncle now,” said Polly. “It was he who started all this messing about with Magic.”

“All the same, you will come back, won’t you? Hang it all, you can’t leave me alone in a scrape like this.”

“I shall go home by the tunnel,” said Polly rather coldly. “That’ll be the quickest way. And if you want me to come back, hadn’t you better say you’re sorry?”

“Sorry?” exclaimed Digory. “Well now, if that isn’t just like a girl! What have I done?”

“Oh nothing of course,” said Polly sarcastically. “Only nearly screwed my wrist off in that room with all the waxworks, like a cowardly bully. Only struck the bell with the hammer, like a silly idiot. Only turned back in the wood so that she had time to catch hold of you before we jumped into our own pool. That’s all.”

“Oh,” said Digory, very surprised. “Well, alright, I’ll say I’m sorry. And I really am sorry about what happened in the waxworks room. There: I’ve said I’m sorry. And now, do be decent and come back. I shall be in a frightful hole if you don’t.”

“I don’t see what’s going to happen to you. It’s Mr. Ketterley who’s going to sit on red hot chairs and have ice in his bed, isn’t it?”

“It isn’t that sort of thing,” said Digory. “What I’m bothered about is Mother. Suppose that creature went into her room. She might frighten her to death.”

“Oh, I see,” said Polly in rather a different voice. “Alright. We’ll call it Pax. I’ll come back—if I can. But I must go now.” And she crawled through the little door into the tunnel; and that dark place among the rafters which had seemed so exciting and adventurous a few hours ago, seemed quite tame and homely now.

We must now go back to Uncle Andrew. His poor old heart went pit-a-pat as he staggered down the attic stairs and he kept on dabbing at his forehead with a handkerchief. When he reached his bedroom, which was the floor below, he locked himself in. And the very first thing he did was to grope in his wardrobe for a bottle and a wine-glass which he always kept hidden there where Aunt Letty could not find them. He poured himself out a glassful of some nasty, grown-up drink and drank it off at one gulp. Then he drew a deep breath.

“Upon my word,” he said to himself. “I’m dreadfully shaken. Most upsetting! And at my time of life!”

He poured out a second glass and drank it too; then he began to change his clothes. You have never seen such clothes, but I can remember them. He put on a very high, shiny, stiff collar of the sort that made you hold your chin up all the time. He put on a white waistcoat with a pattern on it and arranged his gold watch chain across the front. He put on his best frock-coat, the one he kept for weddings and funerals. He got out his best tall hat and polished it up. There was a vase of flowers (put there by Aunt Letty) on his dressing table; he took one and put it in his button-hole. He took a clean handkerchief (a lovely one such as you couldn’t buy today) out of the little left-hand drawer and put a few drops of scent on it. He took his eye-glass, with the thick black ribbon, and screwed it into his eye; then he looked at himself in the mirror.

Children have one kind of silliness, as you know, and grown-ups have another kind. At this moment Uncle Andrew was beginning to be silly in a very grown-up way. Now that the Witch was no longer in the same room with him he was quickly forgetting how she had frightened him and thinking more and more of her wonderful beauty. He kept on saying to himself, “A dem fine woman, sir, a dem fine woman. A superb creature.” He had also somehow managed to forget that it was the children who had got hold of this “superb creature”: he felt as if he himself by his Magic had called her out of unknown worlds.

“Andrew, my boy,” he said to himself as he looked in the glass, “you’re a devilish well preserved fellow for your age. A distinguished-looking man, sir.”

You see, the foolish old man was actually beginning to imagine the Witch would fall in love with him. The two drinks probably had something to do with it, and so had his best clothes. But he was, in any case, as vain as a peacock; that was why he had become a Magician.

He unlocked the door, went downstairs, sent the housemaid out to fetch a hansom (everyone had lots of servants in those days) and looked into the drawingroom. There, as he expected, he found Aunt Letty. She was busily mending a mattress. It lay on the floor near the window and she was kneeling on it.

“Ah, Letitia, my dear,” said Uncle Andrew, “I—ah—have to go out. Just lend me five pounds or so, there’s a good gel.” (“Gel” was the way he pronounced girl.)

“No, Andrew dear,” said Aunty Letty in her firm, quiet voice, without looking up from her work. “I’ve told you times without number that I will not lend you money.”

“Now pray don’t be troublesome, my dear gel,” said Uncle Andrew. “It’s most important. You will put me in a deucedly awkward position if you don’t.”

“Andrew,” said Aunt Letty, looking him straight in the face, “I wonder you are not ashamed to ask me for money.”

There was a long, dull story of a grown-up kind behind these words. All you need to know about it is that Uncle Andrew, what with “managing dear Letty’s business matters for her,” and never doing any work, and running up large bills for brandy and cigars (which Aunt Letty had paid again and again) had made her a good deal poorer than she had been thirty years ago.

“My dear gel,” said Uncle Andrew, “you don’t understand. I shall have some quite unexpected expenses today. I have to do a little entertaining. Come now, don’t be tiresome.”

“And who, pray, are you going to entertain, Andrew?” asked Aunt Letty.

“A—a most distinguished visitor has just arrived.”

“Distinguished fiddlestick!” said Aunt Letty. “There hasn’t been a ring at the hell for the last hour.”

At that moment the door was suddenly flung open. Aunt Letty looked round and saw with amazement that an enormous woman, splendidly dressed, with bare arms and flashing eyes, stood in the doorway. It was the Witch.

“松手!松手!”波莉尖叫著。

“我又沒碰你,”迪格雷說。

接著,他們的腦袋探出了水潭,又回到了各個世界間的樹林,四周陽光明媚,一派寧靜。剛經(jīng)歷了那個地方的腐臭與荒蕪,這片樹林似乎比以前更顯得蒼翠、溫暖和安寧了。我想,要是可以的話,他們倒很樂意又忘了自己是誰,從哪里來的,然后躺下來,在半夢半醒中聆聽著樹木的生長,那該多快樂呀。然而,這一次卻有什么東西使他們異常清醒:因為一爬到草地上,他們就發(fā)現(xiàn)那兒不光有他倆,那個女王,或女巫(隨你叫她什么吧),也跟著來了,她仍然緊緊揪著波莉的頭發(fā)。怪不得剛才波莉大喊“松手”呢。

順便說一句,這也證明了戒指的另一神奇之處,這連安德魯舅舅自己都沒弄清楚,怪不得沒有告訴迪格雷。你不需要戴上或親手觸到戒指,只要觸到一個碰到戒指的人,你就能從一個世界穿越到另一個世界。這效應(yīng)很像磁鐵;人人都知道,如果用一塊磁鐵去拾一枚別針,那么挨著這枚別針的其他別針也會被吸起來。

簡蒂絲女王一來到這座林子里,整個人都變了。她臉色比以前蒼白了不知多少,這使得她的美貌蕩然無存。她屈下身來,像是透不過氣,那地方的空氣似乎讓她感到窒息。這會兒,兩個孩子一點兒都不怕她了。

“松手!快松開我的頭發(fā),”波莉喊叫著?!澳阆敫墒裁矗俊?/p>

“聽著!松開她的頭發(fā),快點!”迪格雷命令她。

兩人轉(zhuǎn)身與她廝打了起來。她斗不過他們,很快被迫松開了手。她一個趔趄向后跌去,喘著粗氣,眼中露出恐懼的神色。

“快,迪格雷!”波莉說。“換戒指,跳進回家的水潭!”

“救命!救命!行行好!”女巫有氣無力地喊著,跌跌撞撞地跟在后面?!鞍盐?guī)习?。你們可不能把我留在這鬼地方,這簡直要我的命啊?!?/p>

“此乃治國之謀略,”波莉挖苦她,“就像你殺盡你的世界里的那些人一樣???,迪格雷?!彼麄円呀?jīng)戴上了綠戒指,但迪格雷說:

“唉,討厭!我們要干什么來著?”他禁不住有點同情女王了。

“喂,別當(dāng)傻瓜,”波莉說,“她八成是裝的??禳c兒?!庇谑牵瑑蓚€孩子都跳進了回家的水潭?!岸嗵澪覀冏隽擞浱枺辈ɡ蛳?。但是,當(dāng)他們跳下去時,迪格雷感到他的耳朵被兩根巨大而冰冷的手指捏著。他們沉了下去,他們自己那個世界的模糊景象開始顯露了,而抓著耳朵的手指也越來越有勁。很顯然,女巫正在恢復(fù)她的氣力。迪格雷掙扎著,踢騰著,可都不管用。不一會兒,他們便出現(xiàn)在安德魯舅舅的書房里;安德魯舅舅驚得直瞪著迪格雷從另一世界帶回的這個怪物。

真難怪他瞪大了眼。迪格雷和波莉也瞪大了眼。毫無疑問,女巫從虛弱中緩過來啦;你看,她出現(xiàn)在我們的世界里了,和周圍的普通事物一比,真讓人倒吸一口涼氣。在恰恩,她已經(jīng)夠讓人吃驚的了;在倫敦,她簡直讓人恐懼。正是因為,他們到現(xiàn)在才搞清楚她到底有多魁梧?!斑@哪是人呀,”迪格雷看著她時這么想。他也許想得不錯,因為有人說過,恰恩皇族有著巨人的血統(tǒng)。然而,比起她的美貌、殘暴和瘋狂來,她體形的龐大算不了什么。她看上去比倫敦街頭的大多數(shù)人要生猛十倍。安德魯舅舅哈著腰,搓著手,說實話,他害怕極了。他在女巫身邊,看上去就像只小蝦米或別的什么小動物。而且,正如波莉后來說的,他和女巫的表情還真有幾分相似,就是所有邪惡的魔法師都有的那種表情,也就是簡蒂絲說她在迪格雷臉上找不到的那種“標(biāo)記”??匆娝麄z在一起后倒有個好處,就是你再也用不著害怕安德魯舅舅了,就如你見過響尾蛇就不再怕蚯蚓,見過瘋公牛就不再怕奶牛一樣。

“呸!”迪格雷暗自想?!八闶裁茨Х◣?!不配。她才夠格呢?!?/p>

安德魯舅舅不斷地搓著手,鞠著躬。他想套幾句近乎,但又口干舌燥說不出話來。他所謂的用戒指搞出的“實驗”,結(jié)果比他想象的還成功;雖然他搞了很多年魔法,但總是想方設(shè)法把危險留給別人,像今天這樣的事情還從未發(fā)生過。

這時,簡蒂絲開口了,聲音不大,卻有股力量使整個屋子都震顫了起來。

“把我召到這個世界來的魔法師在哪兒?”

“啊——啊——夫人,”安德魯舅舅喘著粗氣說,“我甚感榮幸——欣慰至極——喜出望外——真是有失遠(yuǎn)迎呀——我——我——”

“魔法師在哪兒?蠢貨!”簡蒂絲問。

“鄙人——鄙人就是,夫人。還望您多多包涵——呃——這些調(diào)皮的孩子對您的冒犯。我向您保證,他們絕非有意——”

“你就是?”女王質(zhì)問,聲音越發(fā)可怕了。說著,她一步跨過屋子,揪住安德魯舅舅的一大把灰發(fā),將他的頭往后拽去,迫使他仰頭對著自己。接著,她像在恰恩王宮打量迪格雷的臉那樣仔細(xì)打量起他的臉來。他眨巴著眼睛,舔著嘴唇,緊張得要命。最后,她放開了他,猛一松手,他一個趔趄向后跌去,撞在了墻上。

“我知道了,”她輕蔑地說,“你是魔法師——法力算不得高明的那種。站起來,狗東西,別像跟你的同類說話那樣趴在那兒。你是怎么學(xué)會魔法的?我敢發(fā)誓,你沒有皇族血統(tǒng)?!?/p>

“好吧——呃——嚴(yán)格說來也許沒有,”安德魯舅舅結(jié)結(jié)巴巴地說,“沒有地地道道的皇族血統(tǒng)??墒前?,夫人,凱特利家族是很古老的,可算是多塞特郡的一個世家了。”

“打??!”女巫說?!拔颐靼啄闶钦l了。你就是一個書不離手、口訣不離口的不中用的小魔法師,你的血液和心臟里都沒有真正的魔力。你這類魔法師一千年前就在我們的世界里絕種了。不過現(xiàn)在,我允許你做我的仆人?!?/p>

“能為您效勞——我真是榮幸至極——欣喜萬分,這全是實話?!?/p>

“住嘴!盡扯些廢話。聽著,這是給你的第一個任務(wù)。我看我們是在一個大城市里。立刻去給我弄輛馬車,要不飛毯,要不一條訓(xùn)練有素的飛龍,反正你們這兒皇家貴族常用的啥都行。然后帶我去能搞到符合我身份的服裝、首飾和奴隸的地方。明天,我就要開始征服這個世界了。”

“我——我——我這就去叫一輛出租馬車,”安德魯舅舅喘著氣說。

“站住,”他剛走到門口,女巫又喊叫起來,“休想耍滑頭。我的眼睛能穿透墻壁,直看到人的心里去。隨你走到哪兒都逃不過我的眼睛。你一有違抗的苗頭,我就對你施咒,那么你坐上什么,什么就變成燒紅的鐵;不論你何時躺上床,腳下都會有看不見的冰塊。好吧,快去?!?/p>

那老家伙像一條夾著尾巴的狗一樣出去了。

孩子們這會兒很怕簡蒂絲向他們問起樹林里發(fā)生的事兒,結(jié)果她提也沒提,后來也沒再提起過。我想(迪格雷也是這么想的),她那樣的腦袋根本記不住那種寧靜的地方,不管你帶她去多少次,把她留在那里多久,她仍然什么都不會記得。這會兒,屋里只剩她和孩子們了,可她壓根兒沒注意到他們,這也正符合她的做派。在恰恩,她根本不去注意波莉(直到最后),因為迪格雷才是她想利用的人。既然現(xiàn)在她有了安德魯舅舅,便再也不注意迪格雷了。我覺得大多數(shù)女巫都這樣,她們極端講究實用,對自己不能加以利用的人和物絲毫沒有興趣。所以,屋子里安靜了一陣子。不過,你能看出簡蒂絲越來越不耐煩了,因為她就這么在地板上踱過來踱過去的。

不一會兒,她仿佛自言自語地說:“這老傻瓜在搞什么名堂?我真該帶根鞭子來?!闭f著,她大踏步跨出門去追蹤安德魯舅舅去了,都顧不上瞟孩子們一眼。

“噓——”波莉長長地舒了口氣?!拔椰F(xiàn)在得回家了。太晚了,要挨罵了?!?/p>

“那就去吧,快去快回,”迪格雷說?!鞍阉竭@兒來簡直太可怕了。我們得想出點對策?!?/p>

“這回有你舅舅受的了,”波莉說,“就是他用魔法搞出這個亂子來的?!?/p>

“不管怎樣,你會回來的,對嗎?豈有此理,你可不能把我一個人留在這鬼地方?!?/p>

“我從隧道回家,”波莉冷冷地說,“那樣最快。你要是想讓我回來,是不是最好說聲對不起呢?”

“對不起?”迪格雷嚷了起來?!疤炷?,搞得跟個娘兒們似的!我究竟做錯了什么?”

“噢,也沒什么,”波莉挖苦說,“只不過在那間蠟像廳像個欺小凌弱的暴徒,差點把我的手腕擰斷;只不過像個蠢蛋似的拿起錘就去敲鐘;只不過在樹林里還沒等跳進回家的水潭就轉(zhuǎn)身了,結(jié)果讓她逮著機會抓住了你。就這些嘍?!?/p>

“哦,”迪格雷吃驚地說,“好吧,好吧,我向你賠不是啦。蠟像廳里發(fā)生的事我實在抱歉。好了,我已經(jīng)向你賠不是啦。有點氣量吧,記得回來。你要是一去不回,我可就掉到一個可怕的坑里啦?!?/p>

“我看你準(zhǔn)不會有事兒。凱特利先生才會坐上燒紅的椅子,床上才會堆滿冰,不是嗎?”

“我擔(dān)心的不是這個,”迪格雷說,“我擔(dān)心的是媽媽。要是那怪物闖進她的房間可怎么辦?準(zhǔn)會把她嚇?biāo)啦豢伞!?/p>

“噢,我明白了,”波莉換了一種語氣說?!昂冒?,這次行動代號‘和平女神’。我會回來的——要是回得來的話?,F(xiàn)在我真的得走了。”她從一扇小門爬了出去,鉆進了隧道;椽子間那塊黑漆漆的地方幾小時前還那么令人激動,讓人感到險象環(huán)生,這會兒看起來卻平平常常,沒什么離奇了。

現(xiàn)在,我們得回頭講講安德魯舅舅了。他從閣樓上跌跌撞撞跑下去時,那顆可憐的衰老的心怦怦亂跳。他手里拿著塊手帕,不時在額頭上擦一下。他一走進樓下的臥室,便把自己鎖在里面。他做的第一件事就是從大衣柜里摸出一個瓶子和一只酒杯,他老把這些東西藏在那里,不讓蕾蒂姨媽找著。他給自己斟了滿滿一杯氣味嗆鼻、大人喝的那種東西,一口氣吞了個干凈。然后,他才長長地舒了一口氣。

“媽呀,”他自言自語道,“可把我嚇壞了。都這把老骨頭了,還倒這種大霉!”

他又倒了一杯,一飲而盡;接著,他開始換衣服了。你從沒見過這種裝扮,但我還記得清清楚楚。他戴上了一副锃亮的硬高領(lǐng),這種領(lǐng)子能一直支著你的下巴;又套上一件印花白背心,把金表鏈露在胸前;他還穿上了出席婚、喪禮時穿的最精致的禮服,并取出了最漂亮的高筒禮帽,把它弄得干干凈凈。他的梳妝臺上有一瓶花(那是蕾蒂姨媽放的),他摘下一朵插在紐扣眼里;又從左邊的小抽屜里掏出一塊手帕(如今都很難買到這么好看的手帕了),并灑上了幾滴香水。他取出系著粗粗的黑綢帶的眼鏡,架上鼻梁,接著對著鏡子欣賞了起來。

你知道,孩子們有孩子們的傻氣,而大人們則有大人們的傻氣。這會兒,安德魯舅舅開始犯大人的傻氣了。既然女巫不在他這間屋子里,他便很快忘了剛才所受的驚嚇,反而對她的美貌想入非非了。他反復(fù)自言自語:“好個優(yōu)雅的婦人,老兄,好個優(yōu)雅的婦人哪。真是頂呱呱的娘兒們?!彼缇屯耸呛⒆觽儼涯莻€“頂呱呱的娘兒們”弄到這里來的,反倒覺得是他自己靠魔法把她從未知的世界里招來的。

“安德魯,我的好小伙兒,”他邊照鏡子邊對自己說,“你都這把年紀(jì)了還保養(yǎng)得這么不錯。真是一表人才哪,先生?!?/p>

你看,這愚蠢的老家伙其實正幻想著女巫會愛上他,這很可能是因為剛剛兩杯酒下肚,也可能是因為穿上了那身漂亮的行頭。不過,無論怎么說,他和孔雀一樣愛臭美;正因為如此,他才成了魔法師。

他開了門,走到樓下,打發(fā)一個女傭去叫一輛雙座馬車(那年頭,每個人都有好多仆人),又朝客廳里張望了起來。不出他所料,蕾蒂姨媽正在那兒忙著修補一塊床墊。床墊鋪在臨窗的地板上,她正跪在上面。

“啊,蕾蒂婭(1),我親愛的,”安德魯舅舅說,“我——我呀——我要出門啦。借我五英鎊或差不多這個數(shù)的錢吧,我遇到了一個好枯娘。”(他老是將“姑娘”說成“枯娘”。)

“沒門兒,親愛的安德魯,”蕾蒂姨媽回絕得既干脆又平靜,她繼續(xù)忙著手中的活兒,連頭也不抬一下。“我告訴過你無數(shù)次了,我是決不會借錢給你的。”

“哎呀,求求您別鬧啦,親愛的枯娘,”安德魯舅舅說,“這事兒要緊得很。您要是不借錢給我,可會讓我很難堪的。”

“安德魯,”蕾蒂姨媽直勾勾地盯著他,“我真奇怪你向我要錢居然不覺得害臊?!?/p>

這句話的背后可有些故事呢,不過說來話長,又枯燥得很,全是些大人們的事兒。你需要知道的是,安德魯舅舅名義上“為親愛的蕾蒂照管財產(chǎn)”,卻啥事兒都不干,還欠了一屁股的煙酒賬(蕾蒂姨媽曾一而再,再而三地替他還錢),這可把蕾蒂搞得比三十年前窮得多啦。

“我親愛的枯娘,”安德魯舅舅說,“你不知道哇,我今天會有些意外的開銷。我不得不去應(yīng)酬一下??禳c兒,別小氣啦?!?/p>

“請告訴我,你要跟誰去應(yīng)酬呢,安德魯?”蕾蒂姨媽問。

“來了位尊尊——尊貴的客人?!?/p>

“尊你個頭!”蕾蒂姨媽說,“都過了一小時了,我壓根兒沒聽見門鈴響?!?/p>

正在這時,門被一把推開了。蕾蒂姨媽扭頭看去,吃了一驚,只見一位體形龐大的婦人站在門口,她穿著華麗,雙臂裸露,目露兇光。這正是那個女巫。

* * *

(1) 蕾蒂婭是蕾蒂的昵稱。

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