人生不設(shè)限·我苦，有人比我更苦

我是父母的第一個(gè)小孩，在任何家庭，這都是值得慶賀欣喜的事，然而我出生時(shí)，沒(méi)人送花給我媽媽。這讓她覺(jué)得受傷，也陷入更深的絕望。

I was my parents' firstborn child. While this would be a major cause for rejoicing in any family, no one sent flowers to my mum when I was born. This hurt her and only deepened her despair. 

她含著淚問(wèn)我爸爸：“難道我就不值得擁有一束花嗎？”

Sad and teary-eyed, she asked my dad, "Don't I deserve fl owers?" 

“對(duì)不起，”爸爸說(shuō)，“你當(dāng)然值得啊。”他去醫(yī)院的花店，很快捧回一束花給她。

"I'm sorry," Dad said. "Of course you deserve them." He went to the hospital flower shop and returned shortly to present her with a bouquet. 

此情此景，我自然一無(wú)所悉，直到13歲左右，因?yàn)槲覇?wèn)父母當(dāng)年他們看到我沒(méi)有四肢時(shí)，最初的反應(yīng)是什么，我才知道這一切。有一天，我跟媽媽說(shuō)起在學(xué)校過(guò)得好慘，還跟她說(shuō)我很討厭自己沒(méi)手沒(méi)腳，結(jié)果媽媽跟我哭成一團(tuán)。媽媽告訴我，她和爸爸已經(jīng)明白上帝對(duì)我有個(gè)特別計(jì)劃，有一天，他會(huì)顯明那個(gè)計(jì)劃。我一直不斷地問(wèn)問(wèn)題，有些問(wèn)題出于我個(gè)人的好奇心，有些則是為了應(yīng)付我那些沒(méi)完沒(méi)了好奇的同學(xué)們。

I was aware of none of this until the age of thirteen or so, when I began to question my parents about my birth and their initial reaction to my lack of limbs. I'd had a bad day at school, and when I told my mum, she cried with me. I told her I was sick of having no arms and legs. She shared my tears and said that she and my dad had come to understand that God had a plan for me and one day He would reveal it. My questions continued over time, sometimes with one parent, sometimes with both. Part of my search for answers was natural curiosity and part of it was in response to the persistent questions I'd been fielding from curious classmates. 

一開(kāi)始，我有點(diǎn)害怕父母會(huì)告訴我什么，而且因?yàn)橛行﹩?wèn)題對(duì)他們來(lái)說(shuō)也難以探究，我不想讓他們難堪。起初，爸爸、媽媽回答得很謹(jǐn)慎，想要保護(hù)我；當(dāng)我漸漸長(zhǎng)大，問(wèn)得更多時(shí)，他們開(kāi)始更深入地談到自己的感受和恐懼，因?yàn)樗麄冎牢乙涯艹惺?。盡管如此，當(dāng)媽媽提到我出生時(shí)她不想抱我，再怎么說(shuō)，還是讓我很難受。我已經(jīng)夠不安了，結(jié)果還聽(tīng)到自己的媽媽說(shuō)她連看我一眼都沒(méi)辦法……那種感受，你自己想象一下吧。

At first, I was a little scared of what my parents might tell me, and, since some of this was difficult for them to delve into, I didn't want to put them on the spot. In our initial discussions my mum and dad were very careful and protective in their responses. As I grew older and pushed harder, they offered me deeper insights into their feelings and their fears because they knew I could handle it. Even so, when my mum told me that she didn't want to hold me after I was born, it was hard to take, to say the least. I was insecure enough as it was, but to hear that my own mother could not bear to look at me was . . . well, imagine how you might feel.

當(dāng)時(shí)我很受傷，覺(jué)得自己被排斥了，但接著我想到父母從那時(shí)開(kāi)始為我付出的一切，他們已經(jīng)多次證明對(duì)我的愛(ài)。在我們聊這些事情的時(shí)候，我已經(jīng)夠大了，可以設(shè)身處地為媽媽著想。關(guān)于我的狀況，除了她自己的直覺(jué)之外，懷孕過(guò)程中沒(méi)有任何人預(yù)先警告過(guò)，因此可以想象當(dāng)時(shí)的她會(huì)有多震驚、多害怕。如果我為人父母，面對(duì)這樣的狀況會(huì)有什么反應(yīng)？我不確定自己是不是可以處理得跟他們一樣好。我把這個(gè)想法跟父母說(shuō)了，隨著時(shí)間的流逝，我們的談話也愈來(lái)愈深入。

I was hurt and I felt rejected, but then I thought of all that my parents have done for me since. They'd proven their love many times over. By the time we had these conversations, I was old enough to put myself in her situation. Other than her intuitive feelings, there'd been no warning of this during her pregnancy. She was in shock and frightened. How would I have responded as a parent? I'm not sure I would have handled it as well as they did. I told them that, and over time we went more and more into the details.

我很高興我們一直等到我有了足夠的安全感，打從心底明白父母的愛(ài)時(shí)，才開(kāi)始更深入地探索這些事情。近幾年來(lái)，我們探究彼此的感受和恐懼，父母幫助我理解他們最初的反應(yīng)，也讓我知道，信仰是如何帶領(lǐng)他們明白我的人生注定要遵從上帝的旨意的。我是個(gè)意志非常堅(jiān)定，而且大部分時(shí)間都很樂(lè)觀的孩子，我的老師、別的家長(zhǎng)和陌生人常常跟我父母說(shuō)，我的態(tài)度激勵(lì)了他們。其實(shí)是因?yàn)槲伊私獾?，盡管我面對(duì)的挑戰(zhàn)十分艱巨，但很多人的人生包袱卻比我沉重。

I'm glad that we waited until I was secure, knowing deep in my heart of hearts that they loved me. We've continued to share our own feelings and fears, and my parents have helped me understand how their faith enabled them to see that I was destined to serve God's purpose. I was a fiercely determined and mostly upbeat child. My teachers, other parents, and strangers often told my parents that my attitude inspired them. For my part, I came to see that as great as my challenges were, many people had heavier burdens than mine. 

今天，當(dāng)我在世界各地旅行時(shí)，常會(huì)看到人們?cè)庥龅母鞣N磨難。我見(jiàn)過(guò)生重病的孤兒、被強(qiáng)迫的少女、窮到?jīng)]錢(qián)還債而坐牢的男人等等，這讓我對(duì)自己擁有的一切心懷感激，不會(huì)一直去注意我所缺失的東西。

Today in my travels around the world, I often see incredible suffering that makes me grateful for what I have and less inclined to focus on what I may lack. I have seen orphaned children with crippling diseases. Young women forced into sexual slavery. Men imprisoned because they were too poor to pay a debt. 

苦難到處可見(jiàn)，而且常常是令人不可置信的殘酷。然而，即使在最糟糕的貧民窟和最可怕的悲劇里，我還是看到人們不只是活著，而且從中茁壯成長(zhǎng)，這讓我覺(jué)得振奮。埃及首都開(kāi)羅郊外有個(gè)叫“垃圾城”的地方，那是最爛的貧民窟，但我在這里卻找到了歡樂(lè)。瑪西耶特那塞地區(qū)位于一座高聳的懸崖邊，有5萬(wàn)居民，“垃圾城”這個(gè)可悲卻真實(shí)的稱(chēng)號(hào)及社區(qū)里的沖天臭氣，來(lái)自大多數(shù)居民賴(lài)以為生的工作——收集垃圾。他們每天都會(huì)翻遍開(kāi)羅，把垃圾拖回來(lái)，然后在里面挑挑揀揀。他們?cè)陂_(kāi)羅1800萬(wàn)居民制造出來(lái)的幾座山一般的垃圾堆里翻找、分類(lèi)，希望從中挑出可以變賣(mài)、回收或再利用的東西。

Suffering is universal and often unbelievably cruel, but even in the worst of slums and after the most horrible tragedies, I have been heartened to see people not only surviving but thriving. Joy was certainly not what I expected to find in a place called "Garbage City," the worst slum at the edge of Cairo, Egypt. The Manshiet Nasser neighborhood is tucked into towering rock cliffs. The unfortunate but accurate nickname and the community's rank odor come from the fact that most of its fifty thousand residents sustain themselves by combing through Cairo, dragging its garbage there, and picking through it. Each day they sort through mountains of refuse pulled from a city of eighteen million residents, hoping to find objects to sell, recycle, or somehow make use of. 

那里的街道滿(mǎn)是廢棄物堆、豬圈和發(fā)臭的垃圾，這種情景會(huì)讓你以為那里的人肯定活在絕望中，然而2009年我到“垃圾城”去，卻看到完全相反的情況。那里的生活當(dāng)然很艱苦，但我碰到的人卻很有愛(ài)心，充滿(mǎn)單純的喜樂(lè)，而且信心滿(mǎn)滿(mǎn)。埃及人民有九成是穆斯林，“垃圾城”是唯一以基督徒為主的地區(qū)，有將近98%的居民是科普特基督徒。

Amid streets lined with garbage piles, pig pens, and stinking trash, you would expect people to be overcome with despair, yet I found it to be quite the opposite on a visit in 2009. The people there live hard lives, to be sure, but those I met were very caring, seemingly happy, and filled with faith. Egypt is 90 percent Muslim. Garbage City is the only predominantly Christian neighborhood. Nearly 98 percent of the people are Coptic Christians. 

我去過(guò)世界各地最窮苦的貧民窟，“垃圾城”的環(huán)境算是最差的，但那里也是最溫暖人心的地方。我和大約150個(gè)人擠在一棟很小的水泥建筑里，那是他們的教會(huì)。當(dāng)我開(kāi)始演講時(shí)，聽(tīng)眾向我散發(fā)出單純的喜樂(lè)，讓我很感動(dòng)，我的人生極少如此充滿(mǎn)祝福。當(dāng)我告訴他們耶穌如何改變我的生命時(shí)，我感謝他們因?yàn)橛行叛龆靡猿江h(huán)境。

I've been to many of the poorest slums in all corners of the world. This was one of the worst as far as the environment, but it was also one of the most heart-warming in spirit. We squeezed nearly 150 people into a very small concrete building that served as their church. As I began speaking, I was struck by the joy and happiness radiating from my audience. They were simply beaming at me. My life has rarely seemed so blessed. I gave thanks that their faith lifted them above their circumstances as I told them how Jesus had changed my life too. 

教會(huì)領(lǐng)袖跟我談到上帝的力量如何改變當(dāng)?shù)鼐用竦纳Ｋ麄兊呐瓮⒉辉谟谶@個(gè)地上的生命，而是在永生；與此同時(shí)，他們?nèi)匀幌嘈牌孥E，并對(duì)上帝的存在與作為充滿(mǎn)感恩。離開(kāi)前，我們送給幾個(gè)家庭一些米、茶和足夠他們買(mǎi)幾個(gè)星期食物的少量現(xiàn)金，也送給孩子們一些體育用品，比如足球和跳繩，他們馬上邀請(qǐng)我們的團(tuán)隊(duì)一起玩球。盡管周遭一片臟亂，我們?nèi)匀粴g笑連連，彼此都玩得很開(kāi)心。我永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)忘記那些孩子和他們的笑容，他們?cè)俅蜗蛭易C明，只要全然信奉上帝，無(wú)論處于什么樣的環(huán)境，都能過(guò)得快樂(lè)。

I spoke with church leaders there about how lives in the village had changed through the power of God. Their hope wasn't put on this earth, but their hope is in eternity. In the meantime they'll believe in miracles and thank God for who He is and what He has done. Before we left, we presented some families with rice, tea, and a small amount of cash that would buy them enough food for several weeks. We also distributed sports equipment, soccer balls, and jump ropes to the children. They immediately invited our group to play with them, and we had a ball, laughing and enjoying each other even though we were surrounded by squalor. I will never forget those children and their smiles. It just proved to me again that happiness can come to us under any circumstance if we put our total trust in God. 

這些赤貧的孩子怎么還笑得出來(lái)？囚徒怎能歡唱？他們之所以能超越環(huán)境，是因?yàn)橹滥承顩r超出他們的理解與控制，因此他們把焦點(diǎn)放在自己可以理解與掌控的事物上。我的父母也是這樣做的。他們決定信奉上帝的話語(yǔ)，繼續(xù)往前走——上帝說(shuō)：“萬(wàn)事都互相效力，叫愛(ài)神的人得益處，就是按他旨意被召的人。”

How can such impoverished children laugh? How can prisoners sing with joy? They rise above by accepting that certain events are beyond their control and beyond their understanding too, and then focusing instead on what they can understand and control. My parents did just that. They moved forward by deciding to trust in God's Word that "all things work for the good of those who love God, who are called according to His purpose."