“我應(yīng)該等一等”的借口
Dear Greg,
親愛的格雷格,
I started going out with a guy who is really fun andsweet and a breath of fresh air.
我開始跟一個(gè)詼諧貼心的男人約會(huì),他讓我耳目一新。
He calls when he says he's going to, drives sort offar from where he lives to take me out, and we havebeen having a really nice time together.
他答應(yīng)給我打電話就一定會(huì)打,從蠻遠(yuǎn)的地方開車過(guò)來(lái)帶我出去,我們?cè)谝黄鸲冗^(guò)了一段很美好的時(shí)光。
The only problem is he's going through a really ugly custody battle and he can't stop talkingabout it. Really.
唯一的問(wèn)題是他正在經(jīng)歷一場(chǎng)丑陋的監(jiān)護(hù)權(quán)之戰(zhàn),他侃侃而談,停不下來(lái)。
Even when I beg him not to, he can't stop talking about his wife and how much he hates her,what a liar she is, and how he's going to "take her down."
盡管我求他別這樣,他還是無(wú)法停止談?wù)撍钠拮右约皩?duì)她的厭惡,她是個(gè)怎樣的騙子,他打算要如何“挫她的銳氣”。
I understand this is a difficult time for him, and I don't want to blow this just because ithappens to be bad timing.
我明白這段時(shí)間對(duì)他而言很艱難,但是我不想只是因?yàn)檫@個(gè)壞時(shí)機(jī)就告吹。
Should I just try to be supportive and listen to him vent about it all?
我是否應(yīng)該支持他,傾聽他的所有發(fā)泄?
Signed Pam
帕姆
Dear Midnight at the Oasis,
親愛的午夜綠洲,
Wow. So, he's fun and sweet and a breath of fresh air, but can't stop spewing bile and talkingabout his ex-wife.
哇哦,他真有趣貼心,另人耳目一新,但是他不停地吐苦水和談?wù)撍那捌蕖?/p>
Sounds like a catch. Ladies, I mean it.
聽起來(lái)有詐。女士們,我是認(rèn)真的。
I'm very sorry that it's so hard to find a decent guy these days, that you'll let any punctualmale with the ability to dial the phone and drive a car get away with anything.
我很抱歉最近找個(gè)好男人十分艱難,以至于你會(huì)讓任何有能力打電話的守時(shí)的男人開車帶你逃離困境。
It's a sad state of affairs and I'm not sure what can be done about it.
這對(duì)搞外遇而言是個(gè)悲傷的狀況,我不確定還能補(bǔ)救些什么。
As for you, it sounds like there's no chance of him being that into you any time soon, if onlybecause there's simply no room for it in his angry little head right now.
對(duì)你而言,聽起來(lái)像是他沒有很快喜歡你的可能性了,這只是因?yàn)樗麣鈶嵉匦∧X袋里已經(jīng)沒有位置了。
Here's my vote: It doesn't sound like he's given you good enough reason to keep sittingthrough his one-man show called "I Want to Kill My Wife."
這是我的建議:聽起來(lái)不像是他給你一個(gè)很好的理由坐著去聽他的個(gè)人秀“我想殺了我老婆”。
If he misses you, he can get his act together and call you when his head is clearer.
如果他想念你,他可以等到能控制自己的行為、思緒清楚了再給你打電話。
In the meantime, you have much better things to do, including going out and buying a ticket toa much higher quality piece of theater.
在此期間,你要把自己的時(shí)間花在更值得的地方,包括出門買一張去更高質(zhì)量的劇院的票。
Sincerely, Greg
真誠(chéng)的,格雷格
Again, it's never going to be good news if you have to think of your relationship in terms of"waiting for him."
再說(shuō)一次,如果你把自己的愛情當(dāng)作“等待他”,這并不是好消息。
He's not a stock you're supposed to be investing in.
他不是你應(yīng)該投資的股票。
He's a man who's supposed to be emotionally available enough to talk to you, see you, andperhaps fall madly in love with you.
他應(yīng)該是一個(gè)充滿感情地與你談話、看望你,也許是瘋狂的愛著你的人。
That's why he's on a date with you.
這就是他和你約會(huì)的原因。
And if you want to ask for the absolute minimum, he can at least have the courtesy to be goodcompany.
如果你想知道絕對(duì)最小值,他至少可以出于禮貌作陪。
It's So Simple
顯而易見
Yes. You are going to meet many men in many different stages of recovering from relationships.
是的,你在從戀情中的各個(gè)恢復(fù)階段會(huì)遇上很多男人。
If he is really into you, he will get over his issues fast and make sure he doesn't lose you.
如果他真的喜歡你,他會(huì)盡快解決自己的問(wèn)題來(lái)確保不會(huì)失去你。
Or he will make it clear to you how he feels, so there's no mystery, and tell you up front thathe's not up to it right now.
否則他會(huì)告訴你他的真實(shí)感受,所以這里沒有秘密,而且會(huì)事先告知你他現(xiàn)在不想應(yīng)對(duì)。
And then you can best be sure, the minute he is ready, he will run out and find you. You arenot easily forgettable.
然后你可以十分確定,一旦他準(zhǔn)備好了會(huì)狂奔向你。你不是能輕易忘卻的對(duì)象。
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