他其實(shí)沒那么喜歡你 第49期:和癮君子戀愛

The "At Least It's Not the Hard Stuff" Excuse

“至少這不是烈性酒”的借口

Dear Greg, My boyfriend is a lawyer and happens tosmoke pot every night.

親愛的格雷格，我的男朋友是個律師，每晚吸大麻。

When he does, he acts and talks just like he doeswhen he's sober.

當(dāng)他吸大麻的時候，他的行為舉止是清醒的。

I guess it's weird that he's always high and I'm not,but it doesn't seem to be an issue with us.

他一直在嗑藥而我沒有，我猜這點(diǎn)很奇怪，但是這貌似對我倆來說并不是問題。

My friends think it's weird that I'm dating a pothead.

我朋友覺得我跟一個癮君子戀愛很奇怪。

But it's not like he's really acting like a pothead, so what does it matter?

但是他的行為并不像癮君子，所以這有什么問題呢?

I can't imagine how this has anything to do with how into me he is or not. Right?

我無法想象這件事跟他喜不喜歡我有什么關(guān)系。不是嗎?

Signed Shirley

雪莉

Dear High Times, Wrong!

親愛的爽翻時刻，錯了!

Let's take a quick health ed class on what pot does to the brain.

讓我們快速上一堂大麻對人腦影響的健康教育課。

Smoking pot makes your brain work slower, and makes you less in tune with your surroundingsand more introverted.

吸大麻會讓你的大腦運(yùn)轉(zhuǎn)緩慢，使你跟周圍環(huán)境更不搭調(diào)，以及更內(nèi)向。

It dulls your senses and clouds and impairs your sense of reality.

它使你感官遲鈍，擾亂損害你的現(xiàn)實(shí)感。

So, he's always stoned when he's with you.

因此，他跟你在一起的時候是不省人事的。

That really means he likes you more when there's less of you.

那其實(shí)意味著當(dāng)你缺失不全的時候他更喜歡你。

You're going out with someone that doesn't enjoy you at your full levels.

你在跟一個不完全喜歡你的人約會。

That's tantamount to him liking you better when you're in the other room.

那對他而言無異于更喜歡你在另一個房間的時候。

This doesn't mean that he's not into you. It just means that he likes his pot better than you.

這并非意味著他不喜歡你，這意味著相較而言他更喜歡大麻。

By the way, if he ever got arrested for pot, he most likely would lose his license, becausecriminals are not allowed to be officers of the court.

順便一提，如果他因吸食大麻被捕，他很可能會失去他的執(zhí)照，因?yàn)樽锓甘遣辉试S做法務(wù)人員的。

So at least you're in good company, because he likes pot better than his job, too!

所以至少你是個好伙伴因?yàn)樗蚕矚g大麻甚于他的工作!

XOXO, Greg

親親抱抱，格雷格

Don't be fooled. Don't let the guy who's not falling down drunk and peeing in his pants getaway with the fact that he is quietly, more gracefully, bombed out of his mind every singlemoment he's with you.

別犯傻了。不要忽視事實(shí)，這個沒有爛醉如泥和尿褲子的男人在與你在一起的每分鐘，其實(shí)腦海內(nèi)都在安靜得體的爆炸。

It's still inebriation, it's still checking out, and it's still not good enough for you.

它仍然是醉的，它還在檢測，它對你而言還是不夠好。