他其實(shí)沒那么喜歡你 第40期:男人出軌是否要原諒?
第五章
He's Just Not That Into You If He's Having Sex withSomeone Else
如果他跟別人做愛，那他其實(shí)沒那么喜歡你
There's Never Going to Be a Good Excuse forCheating
偷吃永遠(yuǎn)不是一個(gè)好借口
If he cheats on you, throw the deadbeat out.
如果他出軌，就把這賴賬貨扔出去。
Just kidding. I know things aren't that simple.
開玩笑的。我知道到事情沒有那么簡單。
This is a very complicated subject, I'll admit.
我承認(rèn)這事兒非常復(fù)雜。
Some will argue, "It's just sex, what does it matter?"
有些人會(huì)爭辯說，“這只是做愛而已，有什么大不了的?”
Some will argue that you shouldn't throw away a meaningful relationship just because of oneindiscretion.
有些人會(huì)說你不能因?yàn)橐淮问ё憔头艞壱欢螐涀阏滟F的感情。
This all may be true. But this is what I know: Whatever problems you may have been having inyour relationship, they didn't merit him having sex with someone else.
這也許說的對(duì)。但是我所知道的是：不管你們的感情出現(xiàn)了什么問題，都不應(yīng)該是促使他出軌的原因。
Don't ask what you did wrong. Don't share the blame.
不要問自己做錯(cuò)了什么，不要分擔(dān)責(zé)任。
And in case he tells you that it just "happened," please remember, cheating doesn't just"happen."
萬一他跟你說那是不小心發(fā)生的，請(qǐng)記住，出軌不會(huì)不小心發(fā)生。
It's not an accident as in, "Oops, I just slipped and fell into a sexual relationship with someoneelse."
這不是一個(gè)意外，“哦，我不小心滑倒，墜入了出軌的境地。”
It was planned and executed with the full knowledge that it could end your relationship.
它是是在全面了解到可能會(huì)終結(jié)這段戀情的情況下計(jì)劃好并執(zhí)行的。
Know this: If he's sleeping with someone else without your knowledge or encouragement, heis not only behaving like a man who's just not that into you, he's behaving like a man whodoesn't even like you all that much.
你要知道：如果在你不知情和不鼓勵(lì)的情況下，他和別人睡了，他的表現(xiàn)不僅是沒那么喜歡你，而是完全不喜歡你。
The "He's Got No Excuse and He Knows It" Excuse
“他沒找借口而且他自己知道”的借口
Dear Greg, I have been living with my boyfriend for a year.
親愛的格雷格，我和我男友同居一年了。
I recently found out that about a month ago he slept with someone he worked with, twice. (Thegirl told me at a party! )
最近我發(fā)現(xiàn)一個(gè)月前他跟一個(gè)同事睡了兩回。(那婊砸在派對(duì)上告訴我的!)
I confronted my boyfriend and he confessed.
我跟我男友對(duì)質(zhì)，他承認(rèn)了。
I packed my things and moved to a friend's.
我收拾了東西搬去朋友家住。
He's now calling me constantly, begging me to give him a second chance.
現(xiàn)在他一直給我打電話，求我再給他一次機(jī)會(huì)。
He says he doesn't know why he did it, but promises he'll never do it again.
他說他也不知道為什么這么做了，但是答應(yīng)我再也不犯了。
He really feels bad about it. What should I do?
他對(duì)此十分難過，我該怎么辦呢?
Signed Fiona
菲奧納
Dear A Month Ago, Let's see.
親愛的一個(gè)月前，讓我想想。
He slept with someone else while he was living with you, and you only found out because thegirl told you about it.
他在跟你同居期間跟別人睡了，然后你發(fā)現(xiàn)的原因是那個(gè)女孩兒告訴你了。
Sounds like a winner. When's the wedding?
聽起來是個(gè)贏家。打算啥時(shí)候結(jié)婚?
Seriously, let's talk about that special month in your home.
嚴(yán)肅點(diǎn)兒，讓我們來談?wù)勀慵疫@特別的一個(gè)月。
In that month, he had sex with someone else twice, came back, and slept in the same bed withyou.
在這個(gè)月里，他出軌兩次，然后回來跟你躺在一張床上。
He was actively hiding this secret from you every time he looked into your eyes.
他每次直視你的雙眼時(shí)都在靈敏地隱藏自己的秘密。
And let's remember, this gentleman didn't confess by his own volition—Skanky theHomewrecker did it for him.
記住，這位紳士并不是在自己的意志下承認(rèn)錯(cuò)誤的——是討人嫌的家庭破壞者承認(rèn)的。
