生活英語(yǔ)聽(tīng)力文章：和朋友建立融洽的關(guān)系

00:00

00:00

MP3下載 文本下載

https://online2.tingclass.net/lesson/shi0529/0009/9545/23.mp3

https://image.tingclass.net/statics/js/2012

　　Modeling Builds Rapport

　　效仿他人構(gòu)建融洽關(guān)系

　　Have you ever noticed how you are drawn to people with whom you share things in common? This is called the law of attraction and means that you will inevitably be attracted to people into your life that are similar to you. We don’t need to look far beyond our close friends to understand that we are drawn to people with similar interests. So, how can you use this natural tendency to your advantage in all of your relationships?

　　你有沒(méi)有注意到你會(huì)被和你有共同點(diǎn)的人所吸引?這就是所謂的吸引準(zhǔn)則，你會(huì)不可避免的被和你相似的人吸引進(jìn)入你的生活。我們?cè)谂笥讶χ芯湍芸闯鑫覀儠?huì)被和我們有共同愛(ài)好的人吸引。所以你怎么把這一自然趨勢(shì)當(dāng)成優(yōu)勢(shì)用在你的人際關(guān)系中呢?

　　Two key methods come to mind:

　　請(qǐng)記住兩個(gè)關(guān)鍵的方法

　　Become aware of activities, interests and relationships you may have in common with people and pay particular attention during conversations. You may both have children, you may both work in the same part of town, you may both have a son who plays soccer, or you may both like Thai food.

　　Throughout my career I have made it a point of asking people questions with the goal of identifying things we have in common. Once I identify something we have in common, I transition the conversation to that subject. When I do, I almost immediately feel them connecting with me.

　　留心你們共同的活動(dòng)、興趣和人際關(guān)系，尤其是在交談中特別關(guān)注下。你們可能都有孩子，在同一個(gè)地段上班，都有一個(gè)踢足球的兒子，或者都喜歡泰國(guó)菜。通過(guò)暢談職業(yè)我問(wèn)一些問(wèn)題用以辨認(rèn)我們是否有共同點(diǎn)。一旦發(fā)現(xiàn)有共同點(diǎn)，我會(huì)把話題轉(zhuǎn)移過(guò)去，當(dāng)我這么做時(shí)，我?guī)缀趿⒖谈械剿麄兿蛭铱拷恕?/p>

　　Model people. What do I mean? Modeling is a technique to mirror or match the non-verbal and verbal communication of others. As an example, when I am around people who talk softly, then I moderate my voice and speak softly. If they talk slowly, then I will do my best to match their speed and speak slowly. If they lean back in their chair, then I will casually lean back. If their legs are crossed, then I will cross my legs.

　　Now you may think that people will notice that you are modeling them and misinterpret the behavior as mimicking. While there is a risk of this occurring, it really depends on how obvious you are in your modeling. For example, if I am sitting at a table with someone who leans back in their chair, I won’t instantly lean back; rather I will wait a couple seconds to model their position.

　　效仿他人。這是什么意思呢?它是反映或匹配他人非口頭或口頭交流的一種手段。拿個(gè)例子來(lái)說(shuō)吧，當(dāng)我身處一群話語(yǔ)輕柔的人中，我會(huì)減輕語(yǔ)調(diào)和語(yǔ)速，如若他們說(shuō)話很慢，我就會(huì)盡量匹配他們的語(yǔ)速，說(shuō)話也慢下來(lái)，如若他們靠椅而坐，我也會(huì)隨意的靠椅而坐，他們要是把腿交叉起來(lái)，我也會(huì)這樣。你會(huì)覺(jué)得別人會(huì)發(fā)覺(jué)你在效仿他們并可能誤解你的這種行為是一種模仿的行為。當(dāng)這種情況發(fā)生時(shí)，主要是因?yàn)槟阈Х碌臅r(shí)候太過(guò)明顯。舉個(gè)例子吧，如果我和一個(gè)背靠椅而坐的人坐在一起，我不會(huì)立即這樣做，我會(huì)等個(gè)幾秒中再去效仿他人的行為。

　　I have been using this method of building rapport for more than 23 years and I am not aware of a time when someone picked up on the fact that I was modeling him or her. After all, why should people be suspicious? You are just like them.

　　我用這種方式和朋友建立超過(guò)23年的融洽關(guān)系，期間我從未發(fā)覺(jué)他人覺(jué)得我是在模仿他或她。畢竟，他們也沒(méi)有理由去懷疑呀。你僅僅只是喜歡他們而已嘛。

　　There will also be occasions when you will want to lead those you are modeling. For instance, if you are with a prospective client and you find yourselves both leaning back while engaging in small talk, a posture change would be appropriate when the conversation shifts to the business at hand. In that scenario, it may be appropriate to change your posture and lean forward to emphasize or show them something. In most cases they will follow your lead and lean forward.

　　也會(huì)有你去引導(dǎo)你想要效仿的人的時(shí)候。比如，當(dāng)你和潛在客戶向后傾斜閑聊，如果把話題轉(zhuǎn)移到手頭工作上這時(shí)最好改變下坐姿。這種情況下最好身體前傾去強(qiáng)調(diào)或顯示一些東西給他們，大多數(shù)情況下他們會(huì)依著你的指導(dǎo)前傾身體的。

　　This past week a gentleman with enormous energy interviewed me. I had done my research prior to the interview and knew I would have to step up my energy to match his. When we were finished, he gave me a high five and said, “Todd, that turned out great!” I am confident that modeling my energy with his created an instant bond.

　　上周以為精力十足的紳士面試了我。在此之前我做了研究，知道我必須要顯示和這項(xiàng)工作匹配的能力出來(lái)。當(dāng)面試結(jié)束后，他對(duì)我很滿意，說(shuō)到“Todd,你太棒了!”我很有信心把我的能力和他的債券匹配在一起。

　　I first learned of the technique of the mirroring and modeling in Anthony Robbins’s bestselling book Unlimited Power. If you would like to learn more about this powerful rapport building technique I would encourage you to read this book. It was one of the best books I have ever read.

　　我首次聽(tīng)說(shuō)鏡像與匹配理論是在安東尼羅賓斯的暢銷(xiāo)書(shū)---無(wú)窮的力量。如果你想了解更多構(gòu)建和諧關(guān)系的技術(shù)，我建議去讀這本書(shū)。它是我讀到過(guò)的最好的書(shū)中的一本。

　　One of the greatest benefits of mirroring and modeling is its ability to accelerate the rapport building process. In my real estate career modeling enabled me to quickly build rapport with my prospective clients, most of whom I had never met before our initial meeting. The end result was 92% of these residential sellers selected me to sell their homes.

　　鏡像匹配最大的一個(gè)好處是能過(guò)加速構(gòu)建和諧關(guān)系的進(jìn)程。在我的房地產(chǎn)事業(yè)中，競(jìng)相匹配理論讓我和潛在客戶快速建立和諧關(guān)系，他們中的很多人都是第一次見(jiàn)，最終有92%的賣(mài)家選我來(lái)出售他們的房屋。

　　If you take the time to build rapport, you will establish an environment of trust and understanding. It is from this foundation that meaningful relationships are built.

　　如果你在構(gòu)建融洽關(guān)系上花費(fèi)時(shí)間，你就會(huì)營(yíng)造出一個(gè)信任與理解的環(huán)境。這是構(gòu)建有意義的人際關(guān)系的基礎(chǔ)。

　　Modeling requires a conscious effort. Choose a safe situation to practice-with a good friend or a family member. Mirror their voice tone, tempo and posture. It may be awkward at first but you will soon recognize its value. Just have fun with it. You have nothing to lose.

　　效仿需要有意識(shí)的的努力。選擇一個(gè)安全的情況，在一個(gè)好朋友或家庭成員里實(shí)踐。反映他們的語(yǔ)音語(yǔ)調(diào)，節(jié)奏和姿勢(shì)。剛開(kāi)始它可能很別扭但你很快就會(huì)認(rèn)識(shí)到它的價(jià)值。去感受它的樂(lè)趣。你沒(méi)有什么可失去的。

　　Modeling people is one of the fastest and most effective ways to build rapport.

　　效仿他人是最快的最有效的構(gòu)建融洽關(guān)系的方法。