職場英語：在家辦公為什么不好的16件事

1. There's no commute so you literally just roll out of bed 10 minutes before your shift starts. But then you feel like a shitty person all day because you didn't shower/try/change out of your PJs.

1. 你以為你在家辦公不用擠公交，就可以多睡會，甚至可以上班前十分鐘再起。然而，多睡的結(jié)果往往是沒時間洗漱或換衣服，而你這一天都會覺得很糟糕。

2. Your roommate/boyfriend resents you because you never leave. Sometimes you're in the exact couch-desk position when he leaves for work as you are when he comes home from work. You try to convince him you moved to go to the bathroom but he doesn't totally believe you. *Uses foot to slyly push bedpan under table. What he doesn't know won't hurt him. Shhh.*

2. 室友或男朋友越來與嫌棄你，因為你永遠都不出門。他們出門上班的時候，你就坐在沙發(fā)上辦公，而他們下班回來，你還是坐在沙發(fā)上辦公。就算你說你有動過去過廁所，他也不會信你。(其實你可以狡猾地把桌子下的便盆踢進去。他看不到就不會生氣啦。)

3. There's no "High School Musical we're all in this together" vibe. If you have to work late ... it's just you stuck at home.

3.你要知道，小說里的那些都是騙小孩的。而你就算是加班，也只能是在家加班。

4. Since you're rarely in the office, your wardrobe standards are all fucked up. You go between thinking shitty ripped jeans, Converse, and a sweatshirt are appropriate or you overshoot it and end up wearing something really formal into the office because LOLZ you have no idea.

4. 不去辦公室的你，衣柜里自然也沒有什么衣服。當(dāng)你偶爾要去公司報道時，你會開始糾結(jié)是否要穿你皺巴巴的破洞牛仔褲配帆布鞋和T恤，最后干脆穿了正裝被大家嘲笑了半天，因為你不去公司，你不知道大家平時都穿什么。

5. You can't wander around for 10 minutes on your lunch break deciding where you want to eat. Just the long lonely walk to the fridge.

5.你不需要在午餐時間為了想去哪里吃而猶豫十分鐘。因為冰箱里有什么你就吃什么。

6. Finishing the work day feels anticlimactic AF. It's just you deciding to close your laptop like, "WELP guess that's that!"

6.你本來計劃滿滿，最后還是煩不勝煩”好了就這樣吧，煩死了!“合上電腦，你一天的工作就到此為止了。

7. Not leaving your house for days. My record is two, OK, it's three, FINE, IT'S ACTUALLY FOUR. Your turn.

7. 幾天都不曾出過家門。我的記錄是兩天，好吧，三天!要誠實!好吧，是四天!你呢?

8. After work happy hours, LOL. Your friends with office jobs can easily roll into the bar on the corner for a few cocktails to de-stress, but you have to leave the comfiness of your custom ass-imprint on the couch, get dressed (What are clothes?!), and get to wherever the hell they're meeting in bumblefuck downtown. It's impossible. Plus, sunlight burns your eyes now.

8. 下班后的歡樂時光，容我笑會。在辦公室上班的朋友們下班就溜到酒吧喝杯雞尾酒，緩解一下壓力，而你就要離開沙發(fā)的溫柔鄉(xiāng)，換好衣服，再找到他們嗨皮的鬼地方。然而這你的眼睛已經(jīng)見不得陽光了!

9. You miss seeing your friends with jobs. You try to convince them to come over to your place for some nice pinot grigio and Netflix but they're like, "Hard pass, weirdo; leave your house sometimes, OK?"

9. 你會想念上班的朋友。你想喊朋友來你家小聚，喝點葡萄酒，看看電影，但是他們更喜歡說，“宅男，你也該偶爾出一次家門吧?”

10. People don't take your job as seriously. Just because you don't carry a briefcase and have 15 meetings a day about nothing doesn't mean your job is any less serious. You have most of the classic trappings of a job — you know, you have to work — without the actual office part.

10. 大家都覺得你的工作并不重要。因為你不用拎著手提包每天奔波著開十五個會，而這并不代表你的工作就不重要。任何工作都有困難，但你知道，你必須工作，哪怕連個辦公室都沒有。

11. Your mom doesn't believe you have a job, period. She'll call you all day long because you're at home and have 10 hours to talk about the last episode of Passions.

11. 你媽不相信你有工作。因為你整天在家，怕你無聊，她還隨時打電話跟你討論電視劇。

12. You order delivery way too often. Multiple delivery guys know your entire wardrobe (of pajamas) and you spent more money on Thai food last month than you spent on rent. It was worth it. Thai food is delicious.

12. 你是外賣達人。所有的外賣小哥都都認識你，你有幾套睡衣他們都知道。你花在泰國菜上的錢甚至比房租都多，誰讓泰國菜這么好吃呢?

13. You often work way more hours than if you went into an office. Because there's no janitor to turn off the lights and vacuum under your feet, you have no concept of when a day begins and ends.

13. 通常在家工作要比在辦公室花的時間更多。因為家里沒有清潔工幫你關(guān)燈做打掃，而你沒有一天開始和結(jié)束的概念。

14. You get really lazy. Your inner slob is awoken and moving becomes a chore. You'll wait for your boyfriend to get home and be all, "Babe, can you hand me that toast?" and he'll know you got out the bread at 8 a.m., put it in the toaster, sat down, and then didn't move all day. You are properly shamed.

14. 你真的越來越懶了。你骨子里的懶勁都出來了，動一下就感覺自己做家務(wù)一樣。你寧愿一直等到男朋友回家才喊“親愛的，幫我拿一下吐司好嗎?”而他就知道你八點鐘把吐司放進吐司機里，坐下以后就再也沒動。你應(yīng)該覺得臉紅才對。

15. Your dog always barks during important Google Hangouts. Like, he'll sleeping all damn day until you're talking to the the one client you must look professional for, and then he spots a ghost child in a corner and goes apeshit.

15. 你家狗總是要在你用Google Hangouts視頻群聊和你搶耳麥。當(dāng)你必須認真對待你的客戶，然而白日它沒聲沒息只顧睡覺，偏偏這時候冒出來搗亂。

16. You try to do all the things the "experts" recommend, but it's often a load of B.S. You've tried making an office "sacred space," you tried changing into Real Clothes, you've tried not taking phone calls on the toilet. It all lasts about a week before you realize these so-called professionals have never worked from home.

16. 你努力按“專家”建議去做，到頭來發(fā)現(xiàn)都是一派胡言。你努力把辦公室看成是“神圣之地”，換上正式的衣服，不在衛(wèi)生間打電話。然而持續(xù)了一周后，你恍然大悟，那些所謂的“專家”從來不在家辦公。

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