GRE寫作滿分范文四十六

　　"In our time, specialists of all kinds are highly over-rated. We need more generalists — people who can provide broad perspectives."  

　　In today's society, there are many people who feel generalist are more broad than specialists. I will discuss how there is a need for generalists in the medical field, education, and the work place.  First, I will discuss how there is a need for generalists in the medical field. A generalist in this area would be straight foward with clients. For instance, in explaining to a patient they had cancer. A specialist would use wording that you would believe everything is fine.  

　　Second, I will discuss how there is a need for generalists in the education field. In this field some instructors use "big words" and try to out smart themselves with there own thoughts of character.  Last, I will discuss how there is a need for generalists in the workplace. In the workplace the bosses should be open with personell. For instance, instead of acting like they know everything they should be open to knew thoughts and ideas.    

　　COMMENTARY

　　On the surface, this essay appears to present an organized discussion of the issue. In actuality, there are fundamental deficiencies in analysis and development.  

　　The essay begins with a tautology: "...there are many people who feel generalist are more broad than specialists." Then, in the three short paragraphs that follow, the writer promises to discuss "a need for generalists" in a specific field, but none of these discussions materialize.  

　　The rest of the essay only confirms the sense of "fundamental deficiency." Rather than analyze the issue, the writer unpersuasively vilifies specialists as people who use their power to deceive and mislead others.  

　　Although the errors (sentence fragments, incorrect verb tenses, and awkward syntax) are persistent, language problems alone do not earn this essay a score of "1." Rather, this response fits the scoring guide criterion of showing "little evidence of the ability to develop or organize a coherent response to the topic."