六級寫作經典范文及點評：欲望
One of the major pleasures in life is appetite, and one of our major duties should be to preserve it. Appetite is the keenness of living: it is one of the senses that tells you that you are still curious to exist, that you still have an edge on your longings and want to bite into the world and taste its numerous flavors and juices. By appetite, of course, I don’t mean just the desire for food, but any condition of unsatisfied desire, any burning in the blood that proves you want more than you’ve got, and that you haven’t used up your life. Wilde said he felt sorry for those who never got their heart’s desire, but sorrier still for those who did. For appetite, for me, is this state of wanting, which keeps one’s expectations alive.
I remember learning this lesson long ago as a child, when treats and indulgence were few, and when I discovered that the greatest pitch happiness was not in actually eating a toffee but in gazing at it beforehand. True, the first bite was delicious, but once the toffee was gone one was left with nothing, neither toffee nor lust. Besides, the whole toffeeness of toffees was imperceptibly diminished by the gross act of having eating it. No, the best was in wanting it, in sitting and looking at it, when one tasted an endless treasure house of flavors. So, for me, one of the keenest pleasures of appetite remains in the wanting, not the satisfaction. In wanting a peach, or a whisky, or a particular texture or sound, or to be with a particular friend, for in those condition, of course, I know that the object of desire is always at its most flawlessly perfect. For that matter, I don’t want three square meals a day — I want one huge, delicious, orgiastic, table groaning blow out, say every four days, and then not be too sure where the next one is coming from①. A day of fasting is not for me just a device for denying oneself a pleasure, but rather a way of anticipating a rarer moment of supreme enjoyment.
[360 words]
行文點評
作者開篇點題，指出One of the major pleasures in life is appetite。進而作者給appetite下了一個定義，即對任何事物的渴望。接著用王爾德的話引出作者的觀點： Appetite is the state of wanting。在第二段中，作者用I remember...講述了自己吃太妃糖的親身經歷，描述生動形象，貼近生活，由這段經歷作者引出了文章的主題——欲望最大的樂趣在于對之渴求，而非滿足。
作者談的是食欲(appetite)，卻又不僅僅談對食物的熱望。作者由小見大，由食欲談及欲望(desire)，及其滿足(satisfaction)。文章充滿智慧(wits)，是一篇上佳的小品文。讀者應能夠體會作者刻意營造的一種輕靈跳躍(staccato)之感：No, the best was in wanting it, in sitting and looking at it(不，最重要的是對它的渴望和坐下來盯著它看的感覺)。這句話充分體現了作者有極高的駕馭語言的能力。
好文妙譯
欲望
生活中一項最大的樂趣便是有個好胃口，而我們的主要職責之一便是保持這一好胃口。胃口是對生活的一種強烈的愿望，這是一種感覺，它告訴你你仍渴望著，你還有許多渴望尚待實現，還想繼續(xù)生活在這世界上，品嘗各種風味。所謂胃口(欲望)，當然，我不僅僅指對食物的熱望，而且指任何未滿足的渴望的情形，任何血液的沸騰都證明了你要的不僅僅是這些，你還未好好享受人生。王爾德說他對那些從未得到滿足的人表示遺憾，但對那些已經心滿意足的人更感到悲哀。欲望對我來說，是一種渴求的狀態(tài)，它使希望永存。
我記得懂得這一點是在很久以前，還是個孩子的時候，那時有人款待和縱酒享樂的機會很少。而我發(fā)覺最大的幸福不在于吃太妃糖，而在于吃前凝視它的那一段時間。誠然，咬第一口時味道不錯，但一旦太妃糖吃完了，一切皆化為烏有，無論是太妃糖還是欲望全都沒了。此外，太妃糖的味道也在大口咀嚼中毫無覺察地消失了。不，最棒的是對它的渴望和坐下來盯著它看時的感覺，仿佛置身于美食寶庫遍嘗天下美味佳肴時才有的感覺。所以對我而言，欲望的最大樂趣之一在于對之渴求，而非滿足感。想吃一個桃子，或喝一杯威士忌，或是期待一個特別的質感或聲音，又或是渴望能和一個特別的朋友在一起,在這些情況下，我當然知道欲望的目的通常在于其無瑕疵的完美。對此，我不想過一天三頓的正常生活，而想每四天來一頓豐富可口的美味佳肴，大吃大喝一頓，接下來不知下一頓從何而來。一天的禁食對我來說并非像是被剝奪了快樂，而是期待更多縱情享樂的時刻。
詞匯斟酌
appetite n.①胃口，食欲②欲望
keenness n.渴望
numerous a.眾多的，許多的
flavor n.①味，滋味，味道②特色，風味
indulgencen.放任
pitchn.程度，強度
beforehandad.預先，事先
lustn.渴望，欲望vi.(after, for)對…有強烈的欲望
imperceptibly ad.察覺不到地, 微細地
diminish vi.變少，變小，降低vt.減少，減小，降低
orgiastic a.狂歡的
groan vi.①呻吟，抱怨②發(fā)出呻吟的聲音
fast v.禁食，齋戒
device n.手段，策略
supremea.①最高的，至上的②極度的，最重要的
佳句臨摹
①【注釋】blow out 減弱;停止;熄滅
【臨目Somebody opened the door and the candle blew out.有人打開了門，蠟燭隨之被吹滅了。
思如泉涌
A sound mind is in a sound body. 健全的精神寓于健康的身體中。
All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income. 世人莫不懷著一種與生俱來的欲望，要把支出超過收入，此乃一切進步的動力。
