Experts reveal how to avoid embarrassment of buying the wrong gifts this Christmas

Christmas Day is for eating, drinking, watching bad TV - and trying to cover up your embarrassment as you realise your husband's Aunt Maude has spent her pension on your present while you bought her a set of hankies.

在圣誕節(jié)那天，人們吃吃喝喝，看看沒營養(yǎng)的電視劇——還要試圖掩飾因送禮不當(dāng)產(chǎn)生的尷尬，如你丈夫的麥德阿姨用退休金給你買了貴重禮物，而你卻只送了她一套廉價手帕。

Present-buying can be a minefield; from how much to spend, to whether to risk surprising recipients with a gift they don't want, to knowing if you should buy your neighbour you only say hello to a little something.

圣誕節(jié)買禮物是一件很棘手的事，要買多少錢的？是否買收禮人不想要的禮物，出其不意？是否要給點頭之交的鄰居買點小禮物？這些都是需要考量的問題。

Here, FEMAIL has asked experts including dating gurus and personal shoppers for their top tips on present-buying etiquette to ensure the only thing that's red this Christmas is Rudolf's nose.

那么，買禮物有什么講究？為確保大家這個圣誕節(jié)購禮不鬧笑話惹尷尬，F(xiàn)EMAIL征求了專家意見，包括約會專家和私人購物者，現(xiàn)為大家提供以下重要購禮貼士。

YOUR PARTNER

給伴侶的禮物

Spend: New romance £20-50; long-term couples £100-£150

花銷：新情人20-50英鎊；配偶100-150英鎊

'If you've just started seeing someone you don't need to spend a fortune,' says dating guru James Preece P>

“如果你剛開始與某人約會，那就沒必要給對方買很貴重的禮物。”約會專家詹姆斯·普里斯說P>

'It's much better to impress them with your imagination by choosing a gift that’s a little bit different. £20 is about the right amount, with a maximum of £50 if you can afford it.'

“發(fā)揮想象力，選擇與眾不同的禮物讓他們印象深刻，這個法子更好。至于花銷方面，20英鎊最佳，如果負(fù)擔(dān)得起，多花一些也無妨，但不要超過50英鎊。”

Or you don't even need to go that far, says relationship expert and founder of BeLoveCurious.com, Helen Rice. Plan to spend a romantic evening together or have a fun day out. Feel free to give the person you're dating something thoughtful, just don't spend a lot of money.'

“或者根本沒必要想那么多。”人際專家、jamespreecem網(wǎng)站創(chuàng)始人海倫·賴斯（Helen Rice）說。“安排一次浪漫的晚餐或出去開心玩一天。隨意送一些花心思的玩意兒給你約會的對象，只是不要花很多錢在上面。”

'If you're in a long-term relationship then your budget really reflects on your personal situation,' adds James. 'You don't need to go crazy, but it's a great opportunity to show you love and appreciate them.

“如果你與對方是長期交往的關(guān)系，那么你花錢多少確實會反映出你的個人情況。”詹姆斯補充道。“雖然沒必要瘋狂行事，但這是向他們表達(dá)你的愛與感恩的好機會。”

'It's also best to buy a few cheaper presents rather than one big one. Part of the fun is the mystery and unwrapping, so it will last longer if you give them several to enjoy.'

“買幾樣便宜些的禮物好過等額買一樣貴的。收到禮物的樂趣部分來源于禮物的神秘感和拆禮物，所以如果你送他們好幾個小禮物，那份樂趣會更綿長。”

Set a mutual budget

雙方花銷保持一致

'For a new couple, a mutual budget is definitely a great idea,' says James. 'There's nothing worse than one of you going overboard when the other has done the opposite.'

“對新婚夫婦來說，花銷一致無疑是一個好主意。”詹姆斯說。“你花了大價錢而對方卻恰恰相反，沒有比這更糟糕的了。”

He even points out that this is a good test to see if you have differing financial views.

他甚至指出這也是很好的考驗，可以看看雙方是否持有不同的消費觀。

'Some people are natural over-spenders and think that the more they spend then the more you’ll love them. If you aren’t in sync with your spending habits then it can spell problems further down the line.'

“有些人天生大手大腳的，而且認(rèn)為他們花錢越多，你就會越愛他們。如果你不遵循你自己的消費習(xí)慣，接下來就會出現(xiàn)各種問題。”

Long-term couples will likely already have an idea on what to spend, based on previous years and their financial situation - but it is still a good idea to set a maximum spending limit.

而老夫老妻們根據(jù)之前那些年的經(jīng)驗還有他們的經(jīng)濟狀況，可能已經(jīng)拿好主意要買什么了，但制定消費支出最大限額仍是一個不錯的想法。

Surprise them

給對方驚喜

'Whatever relationship stage you are at, you absolutely do have to surprise them,' advises James.

“不管你們的關(guān)系到了哪一步，給對方驚喜都是必須的。”詹姆斯建議。

'For new daters, show that you’ve been paying attention to their hobbies and conversations. If you remembered something small that they said, they’ll be flattered and happy you noticed.

“對于剛開始約會的對象，要表現(xiàn)出你留意到他們的喜好，記得與他們的談話內(nèi)容。如果你記得他們說過的一些小事情，他們會為你留意到那些小事而受寵若驚，感到高興。”

'If you’ve been together a while, you’ll probably have a list of suggestions of things that they want. It's fine to get them something off that but you also have to think outside the box. That's the only way to make it a magical experience for them.'

“如果你們在一起有一段時間了，對方可能會向你暗示過很多他們想要的東西。其實送他們別的東西也是可以的，只不過你也要在禮品盒的包裝上花心思，因為那是唯一一種讓對方覺得你的禮物妙不可言的方式。

Of course most partners drop hints - so make sure you listen.

當(dāng)然，大多數(shù)伴侶都會給對方一些暗示——所以要確保你有留心聽。

If you're still struggling, take them shopping and make a note of what they like, or ask close friends and family for ideas.

如果你還是拿不定主意，那么帶他們?nèi)ベ徫?，然后記下他們喜歡的東西，或者向他們的密友和家人打聽一下他們的喜好。

Of course for some a gift that really matters is something that's wanted and perhaps wouldn’t otherwise be affordable, so just asking if they want a surprise or not may be the safest bet, says Helen.

對于一些人來說，禮物貴在合心意，而不是多數(shù)人買不起的價格，所以先問一下對方是否想要一個驚喜可能會更穩(wěn)妥，海倫說。

Good gift ideas

送禮佳品

Something handmade or baked; a personal IOU voucher - i.e. a massage/home-cooked meal/naughty treat etc; a book that you love and would like to share with them; an event/show tickets; a piece of art; cooking or craft classes; spa days; weekend away; gadgets.

手工制品或烘焙品；私人欠條憑據(jù)——即欠一次按摩/一頓家常飯/一場玩鬧等；一本你喜歡并且想和他們分享的書；一張比賽/表演的票；一件藝術(shù)品；給他們報廚藝班或工藝品制作班；spa體驗；周末出游；一些小玩意兒。

Bad gift ideas

送禮餿品

Novelty or joke items; chocolate, underwear and toiletries (too boring); gift vouchers; something from your local petrol station bought on Christmas eve.

廉價小飾物或笑話集；巧克力，內(nèi)衣和化妝品（太無聊）；禮品券；平安夜在加油站小商店倉促買的東西。

YOUR CHILDREN

給孩子們的禮物

Spend: £100-150 each

花銷：每人100-150英鎊

Of course a lot of what your budget is depends on your income, but the important thing is to set one - and stick to it.

當(dāng)然，你的花銷取決于你的收入，但重要的是你要定個預(yù)算并且按預(yù)算購禮。

'The pressure to make Christmas magical and give their precious darlings everything they want can be overwhelming, and some families find themselves in debt for a good part of the next year,' points out Diana Mather, an etiquette expert working with One4all Gift Cards on its gift-buying campaign.

“讓圣誕變得奇妙，滿足他們珍愛的人所想要的一切，這種壓力是巨大的。有些家庭發(fā)現(xiàn)他們?yōu)榱诉^好圣誕而負(fù)了債。”禮儀專家黛安娜·馬瑟指出。馬瑟從事One4all禮品卡購禮促銷工作。

'Children’s expectations should be managed and realistic guidelines drawn when discussing Christmas presents.

“在討論圣誕節(jié)禮物時，要管一下孩子們的愿望，提供一些現(xiàn)實的參考建議。”

'Young children like to open big colourful gifts, and are often just as happy playing with the cardboard box as the gift itself,' she points out.

“小孩子喜歡打開大包裝、顏色鮮艷的禮物，而且通常玩禮品盒跟玩禮物一樣開心。”馬瑟說。

If there is something you simply have to buy your little one that pushes you over the spending limit, ask family to pitch in with the cost, Diana advises.

如果有樣?xùn)|西你實在想買給你家小孩，但是買了會超出預(yù)算，這時你可以讓家人解囊相助，黛安娜建議道。

Give gift guides to family

給家人愿望清單

The idea of creating a wish list and 'demanding' your family cough up seems very un-British, but duplicate, unsuitable or unwanted gifts currently wastes £2.4billion at Christmas in the UK according to wishagift.com, which allows you to create gift lists online. so it's a worthwhile practise.

制作愿望清單，并“要求”你的家人說出他們的愿望這個點子似乎非常不英式風(fēng)，但根據(jù)wishagift.com網(wǎng)站（該網(wǎng)站提供在線創(chuàng)作禮物清單服務(wù)）的統(tǒng)計，在英國，通常由重復(fù)的、不合適的或者不想要的圣誕禮物而造成的浪費價值24億英鎊。因此，制作愿望清單還是值得一試的。

'The key to going about it is to be reasonable with your expectations,' says Karina Thomsen, founder of wishagift.com. 'Also add a good variety of ideas and price ranges, and don’t necessarily be 100% specific.'

“制作愿望清單的關(guān)鍵是愿望要合理可行。”wishagift.com網(wǎng)站創(chuàng)始人卡琳娜·湯姆森說。“另外，可在清單上添上各種好點子和價格范圍，不必百分百明確具體。”

For example, say ‘Molly loves colourful hair accessories’, and then the family member can still have the freedom to choose one they think she'll like.

例如，上面寫“莫莉喜愛彩色的發(fā)飾”，然后家里人仍可以自由挑選他們認(rèn)為她會喜歡的一樣發(fā)飾。

Good gift ideas

送禮佳品

Books; drawing pads with paints or crayons; building blocks such as Lego; clothes.

書籍；配有顏料和畫筆的圖畫本；兒童積木，如樂高積木；衣服。

Bad gift ideas

送禮餿品

Bead kits; anything messy or noisy if you want your sanity to remain intact this Christmas.

一套珠子；任何亂糟糟或吵鬧的玩意兒（如果你想在這個圣誕節(jié)中保持神智正常的話）。

YOUR TEENAGERS

給十幾歲孩子的禮物

Spend: £150-200

花銷：150-200英鎊

Teens usually want things that can be expensive, but Diana thinks just because it's Christmas, it doesn't mean rules should fly out the window.

青少年通常想要那些昂貴的東西，但黛安娜認(rèn)為不能因為是圣誕節(jié)他們就可以沒規(guī)沒據(jù)了。

'Limits should be set and if they want the latest iPhone 6s, my suggestion would be that they work to earn most of the money and you top it up,' she says.

“要有限度，如果他們想要最新的iPhone 6s，我的建議是讓他們自己掙夠大部分的錢，然后你貼補剩下的。”她說。

Ask them what they want

問他們想要什么

Teenagers are picky and if you buy them something that you think is 'cool' it's likely to be met with a roll of the eyes.

青少年愛挑剔，如果你給他們買了你覺得“酷”的東西，他們很有可能會翻個白眼給你。

Image-conscious teens are also likely to want the latest gadget and best designers.

愛臭美的青少年也有可能會想要最新潮、最時尚的小玩意兒。

If you can't afford it, talk to them to figure out a compromise, whether that's getting the gadget second-hand, or asking them to contribute to the cost.

如果你買不起，就跟他們談?wù)?，找出一種折衷辦法，不管是買二手的還是讓他們自己也出點錢。

Also let family know what your teenager has asked for, but give them the least-expensive requests. And expect the same in return if they have teens.

另外，也要讓家族里其他人知道孩子想要什么，不過只把那些花錢最少的愿望告訴他們。如果他們也有十幾歲的孩子，那就要回一樣的禮。

Make present-buying fun

讓買禮物變得有趣

If your teen has a job or gets an allowance, they should be buying their own presents, but make it fun and set a reasonable budget.

如果你的孩子有工作或者有零用錢，他們應(yīng)該自己給自己買禮物，不過可以讓買禮物變得有趣些，而且要制定合理的預(yù)算。

Diana tells, 'We made it a rule to try and buy the most innovative thing for under £10 for teens and £5 for younger children.

黛安娜說，“我們的慣例是嘗試用少于10英鎊的錢給青少年買最有創(chuàng)意的東西，而小孩子的則少于5英鎊。”

'This made the children take time and think about what people’s likes and interests were, and what their brothers and sisters or cousins would really enjoy.

“這促使孩子們花時間思考人們的興趣愛好所在，以及買什么才會讓他們的兄弟姐妹或表親真正感到歡喜。”

'It worked very well and my sisters and I still have a low budget for ourselves and our partners.'

“這招很有效。我和我的姐妹們依然是花很少錢給我們自己還有我們的伴侶買禮物。”

Good gift ideas

送禮佳品

Gadgets; gift cards; music; games; books

小玩意；禮品卡；音樂；游戲；書籍。

Bad gift ideas

送禮餿品

Any surprises where personal taste is involved, in particular clothes, accessories and perfume/aftershave.

帶有個人喜好的任何驚喜，尤其是衣服、配飾和香水/須后水。

YOUR FAMILY

給家人的禮物

Spend: £20-50

花銷：20-50英鎊

You might want to spend more on your parents and less on your cousins, but the most important thing with present-buying for family is the thought.

你可能想要花更多錢在你父母身上，而且在你表親身上花少一些，只是購買禮物最重要的是心意。

Those with big families may of course need to budget more carefully.

那些家族龐大的人自然可能需要在禮物花銷方面更謹(jǐn)慎一些。

'My best tip is to collate a list of all the people you need to buy presents for and include how much disposable cash you have to spend overall.

“最好的竅門是整理出一份清單，列出你需要買禮物的人員名單，算出你總共要花的可支配現(xiàn)金數(shù)額。”

'This makes it a lot easier to think of possible gifts and allocate budgets', says Milda Chellingsworth, personal shopper, stylist and founder of Styling For You.

“這使你更容易想到合理的禮物以及進(jìn)行預(yù)算分配。”私人購物者、Styling For You創(chuàng)始人兼設(shè)計師米爾德·切林斯沃斯說。

'If times are a bit hard tell everyone you are setting a budget this Christmas and ask them if they would like to do the same,' suggests Diana.

“如果處于經(jīng)濟有點拮據(jù)的時期，就在圣誕節(jié)前告訴每個人你正在制定預(yù)算，并問他們是否也想這樣做。”黛安娜提議。

Also if you're a working married mum, your husband should buy the presents for his own family - but unfortunately you may have to help him so they don't end up with socks and hankies (see 'bad present ideas' below), so be sure to go on a joint shopping trip.

另外，如果你是已婚媽媽、職場女性，你的丈夫應(yīng)該為自己的家人買禮物——不過令人失望的是，你可能不得不幫他出主意，這樣他們才不會買回襪子和手帕（見下面的“送禮餿品”）。因此，務(wù)必要與你丈夫一起為家人購買圣誕禮物。

Surprise them

給他們驚喜

It's a nice idea to surprise parents, in-laws, siblings, cousins, aunties and uncles, but make it a calculated one.

給父母、配偶親屬，兄弟姐妹、表親們、叔叔阿姨們驚喜是個不錯的想法，但要精心策劃。

'Do your research beforehand,' advises Karina. 'Check their favourite brands, notice items that might be running low, or note not-so-subtle hints.

“事先做好調(diào)查。”卡琳娜提議說。“核實他們最喜歡的品牌，留意那些可能快用完的東西或較為明顯的暗示。”

'If you get it wrong though, be warned you may become the recipient of the dreaded #GiftFace!'.

“然而，如果你搞砸了，小心點，你可能會見到滲人的#GiftFace（收到不喜歡的禮物但不得不裝出很開心的樣子）！”

To avoid this, always wrap the gift receipt up with the present, she suggests - that way they can take it back without needing you to know about it.

為了避免遇到這種情況，卡琳娜提議把禮品收據(jù)與禮品放在一塊——這樣的話，收禮者可以在你不知道的情況下去退貨。

Good gift ideas

送禮佳品

Something personalised; a scarf; homeware; kitchen gadgets; cookery books; something for the garden; scented candles/diffusers; chocolate; beauty products; gadgets; novelty DIY kits (like a wine-making or bacon-curing kit); books; a small hamper of unusual produce; wine/champagne.

有個性的東西；圍巾；家用商品；廚房配置；烹飪書；花園用具；香薰蠟燭/柔光鏡；巧克力；美容產(chǎn)品；小玩意兒；廉價自制用具（如釀酒用具、培根加工用具）；書籍；一小籃子不常見的產(chǎn)品；葡萄酒/香檳。

Bad gift ideas

送禮餿品

Socks or hankies; clothes if you have to guess the size; bars of soap; cheap Christmas-themed novelty gifts.

襪子或者手帕；衣服（如果你不清楚其尺碼的話）；幾塊肥皂；以圣誕節(jié)為主題的廉價小玩意兒。

YOUR FRIENDS

給朋友的禮物

Spend: £10-15

花銷：10-15英鎊

Friends can often be closer than family, but this also means you should be understanding of each other's financial constraints.

朋友通常比家人更親密，但這也意味著你應(yīng)當(dāng)了解彼此的經(jīng)濟有限。

'My close friends and I now have a pact about the size of the Christmas gift we give each other,' tells Diana. 'What with partners, children, grandchildren, nephews and nieces, not to mention great nephews and nieces – life can become really expensive!

“現(xiàn)在，我和我的密友們已經(jīng)就互贈圣誕節(jié)禮物的大小達(dá)成了協(xié)定。”黛安娜說。“考慮到要給伴侶們、孩子們、孫子們、侄子女們買禮物，這還沒算上孫侄子女們——生活開銷真的很大！

'Friends should realise this. Decide your limits and then try to find a really fun gift. After all, that is what it is all about - giving - and a pot of home-made jam can give as much pleasure as something much more expensive.'

“朋友們應(yīng)當(dāng)意識到這點。制定支出限度，然后嘗試找到一份真正有趣的禮物。畢竟，那才是圣誕節(jié)禮物的意義所在——給予。另外，一罐自制果醬會帶來很多快樂，與比其貴重得多的東西帶來的快樂相比，沒有什么兩樣。”

The rules are there are no rules

準(zhǔn)則就是沒有準(zhǔn)則

These are your friends, so you'll either know exactly what they want already, or are happy to ask them outright - and either is fine.

這些是你的朋友，因此你要么已經(jīng)知道他們想要什么了，要么能夠愉快坦率地問出口——兩者均可。

'Here we can generalise that an open approach of explicit gift requests, mutual budgets or surprise gifts are welcome,' says Karina.

“在這里我們可以推論出，光明正大、毫不隱諱的禮物請求，保持一致的預(yù)算或者令人驚喜的禮物都是受歡迎的。”卡琳娜說。

'You likely know them far better, and their interests, than the remainder of the people on your gift buying list and probably feel far more comfortable discussing what’s on each of your most wanted lists,' she adds.

“你可能了解他們還有他們的興趣比了解你送禮名單上的其他人更甚，而且在討論你們各自最想要的東西清單時，可能會覺得更為自在。”她補充道。

Good gift ideas

送禮佳品

A spa day for you to share; unusual jewellery; handmade soap; scarf; scented candle; subscription to a magazine; beauty products; wine or any alcohol!

共同享受spa一天；獨特的珠寶；手工皂；圍巾；香薰蠟燭；雜志訂閱；美容產(chǎn)品；葡萄酒或其他酒！

Bad gift ideas

送禮餿品

You can't go far wrong if you put some thought into it.

只要你花心思在上面就不會出什么大差錯。

YOUR FRIENDS

給朋友的禮物

Spend: £10-15

花銷：10-15英鎊

Friends can often be closer than family, but this also means you should be understanding of each other's financial constraints.

朋友通常比家人更親密，但這也意味著你應(yīng)當(dāng)了解彼此的經(jīng)濟有限。

'My close friends and I now have a pact about the size of the Christmas gift we give each other,' tells Diana. 'What with partners, children, grandchildren, nephews and nieces, not to mention great nephews and nieces – life can become really expensive!

“現(xiàn)在，我和我的密友們已經(jīng)就互贈圣誕節(jié)禮物的大小達(dá)成了協(xié)定。”黛安娜說。“考慮到要給伴侶們、孩子們、孫子們、侄子女們買禮物，這還沒算上孫侄子女們——生活開銷真的很大！

'Friends should realise this. Decide your limits and then try to find a really fun gift. After all, that is what it is all about - giving - and a pot of home-made jam can give as much pleasure as something much more expensive.'

“朋友們應(yīng)當(dāng)意識到這點。制定支出限度，然后嘗試找到一份真正有趣的禮物。畢竟，那才是圣誕節(jié)禮物的意義所在——給予。另外，一罐自制果醬會帶來很多快樂，與比其貴重得多的東西帶來的快樂相比，沒有什么兩樣。”

The rules are there are no rules

準(zhǔn)則就是沒有準(zhǔn)則

These are your friends, so you'll either know exactly what they want already, or are happy to ask them outright - and either is fine.

這些是你的朋友，因此你要么已經(jīng)知道他們想要什么了，要么能夠愉快坦率地問出口——兩者均可。

'Here we can generalise that an open approach of explicit gift requests, mutual budgets or surprise gifts are welcome,' says Karina.

“在這里我們可以推論出，光明正大、毫不隱諱的禮物請求，保持一致的預(yù)算或者令人驚喜的禮物都是受歡迎的。”卡琳娜說。

'You likely know them far better, and their interests, than the remainder of the people on your gift buying list and probably feel far more comfortable discussing what’s on each of your most wanted lists,' she adds.

“你可能了解他們還有他們的興趣比了解你送禮名單上的其他人更甚，而且在討論你們各自最想要的東西清單時，可能會覺得更為自在。”她補充道。

Good gift ideas

送禮佳品

A spa day for you to share; unusual jewellery; handmade soap; scarf; scented candle; subscription to a magazine; beauty products; wine or any alcohol!

共同享受spa一天；獨特的珠寶；手工皂；圍巾；香薰蠟燭；雜志訂閱；美容產(chǎn)品；葡萄酒或其他酒！

Bad gift ideas

送禮餿品

You can't go far wrong if you put some thought into it.

只要你花心思在上面就不會出什么大差錯。