中國文化里面,人們通常多久說一次“我愛你”?
I can't remember a single time that my parentsexplicitly told me "I love you." However, I canclearly remember the day I talked to my dad aboutKing Lear.I told him about how sorry I felt for Learbecause he was betrayed by his daughters Goneriland Regan. Lear, knowing that he was getting old,decided to split his kingdom among his 3 girls. Heproclaimed that he would give the greatest share to the one who loved him most.
我不記得我父母有哪一次很明確地跟我說過:“我愛你”了。但是,我很清楚的記得我跟我爸談《李爾王》的那一天。我告訴他,我為李爾的女兒貢納莉和里根的背叛感到多么抱歉。李爾王知道自己老了,于是決定把他的王國分給他的三個女兒。他宣布,他會把最大的那份給那個最愛他的人。
So, Goneril and Regan proceed to deceive their father with lavish expressions of love.Meanwhile the third daughter, Cordelia, refuses to participate in such false displays. She lovesher father too much, and she doesn't want to degrade herself to the level of her sisters.Instead, she says (in an aside): Then, poor Cordelia! And yet not so; since, I am sure, my love'smore richer than my tongue.
因此,貢納莉和里根開始用夸張的詞藻來欺騙自己的父親。同時第三個女兒考狄利婭拒絕加入這種虛假的表現(xiàn)中去。她太愛她的父親了,她不想貶低自己至姐妹的那個水平。相反地,她說(旁自語):“那么,考狄利婭,你只好自安于貧窮了!可是我并不貧窮,因為我深信我的愛心比我的口才更富有。”(莎士比亞《李爾王》,朱生豪譯)
Lear is deeply offended and, in a cruel twist of irony, disinherits the only child who truly lovedhim. Sadly, he later gets kicked out of his own kingdom by the two daughters who claimed toadore him more than anything in the world.
李爾很生氣,殘酷地扭曲了她的話,并且剝奪了唯一真正愛自己的女兒的繼承權。不幸的是,他不久后被他那兩個曾經(jīng)宣稱崇拜自己超過世界上任何事物的女兒逐出了自己的王國。
My father's response to my retelling of the story was approximately the following:That's whyyou don't need to say "I love you." Just saying "I love you"doesn't necessarily mean your love isreal. But if you really love someone, you'll show it with your actions.
我父親聽完我故事的復述之后,回答大致如下:那就是為什么我們不需要說“我愛你”。只會說“我愛你”的話并不意味著你的愛就是真實的。但是如果你真的愛某個人的話,你會用你的行動來證明的。
So although I never heard the words "I love you" from my parents, I always felt loved becausethey told me in ways that speak much louder than words. I think many other Chinese feel thesame way.
所以即使我從來沒有從我父母那里聽到過“我愛你”的話,我也總能感覺得到我是被愛的,因為他們用比言語更加響亮的方式告訴我了。我覺得很多其他中國人也會有同樣的感覺。