我們的內(nèi)心非常強大,在一瞬間就會提升或毀掉我們的心情。而真正的問題在于,如何將內(nèi)心深處那些消極想法通通趕出去。
Many of us have problems with negative thoughts playing on the channel of our minds, but if you’re engaging in it consistently, and you believe it, it could be eroding your sense of self-esteem. Here are a few beliefs that indicate you may need to switch the station:
很多人腦海中都會不斷浮現(xiàn)消極的想法,更糟糕的是,如果你真的時不時地去想,你就會信以為真,這足以摧毀你的自尊。如果你也會出現(xiàn)下面這些消極觀念,那就代表你應(yīng)該做點改變了。
I’m a loser. 我是個失敗者。
I’m not good enough. 我不夠好。
I don’t deserve…. 我不配......
No one likes me. 沒人喜歡我。
I suck at relationships. 我不會處理感情。
I’m a failure. 我太失敗了。
Negative thoughts conjures up bad feelings and hooks you into believing that what those old tapes in your head are playing is actually true. In short, it brings your focus to your failures, and that gets you nowhere.
消極的想法會帶來不好的感受,在那腦海中不斷的像老式磁帶一般重復(fù),也會讓你信以為真。簡而言之,這會讓你把注意力全部放在失敗的事情上,會讓你徹底迷失自己。
What can you do? Here are some suggestions:
你能做些什么呢?下面是一些建議:
1. Live in the moment
活在當下
Self-talk is so subtle that we often don’t notice its effect on our mood and belief systems. Key things to notice are “if only or “what if” statements: the former keep you stuck in the past with regret, while the latter keep you fearful of the future. There is nothing you can do about the past, and the future isn’t here yet, so stay in the present moment.
內(nèi)心的聲音太微妙,有時我們根本不會注意到他們對情緒和信念產(chǎn)生的影響。最需要注意的就是“要是......多好” 和“假使......將會怎樣” 這樣的想法:前者會讓你陷入對過去無盡的悔恨,后者會讓你對未來充滿恐懼。對于過去,你無能為力,而未來還未到來,好好活在當下吧。
2. Visualize the good things
讓那些美好變得形象生動
If we want to change the negative tapes playing in our heads, we have to visualize ourselves positively—that means seeing yourself non-judgmentally. Picture accepting yourself. How would that look? Draw a picture in your mind and expand on it.
如果要換掉腦海中不斷播放的消極磁帶,我們就要看到自己身上積極的一面,也就是說不帶評判的看看自己。在內(nèi)心細細描述客觀接受自己會是什么的畫面。細細畫出心中所想,那會是什么樣?
3. Recognize that actions always follow beliefs
要認識到行為由信念指引
Whatever you believe, you’ll experience more of, and you’ll also find yourself behaving in ways that are congruent with your beliefs. So, start believing the best about yourself: act as if you believe that you’re a valuable and worthy person.
不管你是否相信,你以后的人生會經(jīng)歷更多,也會發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的行為和信念是相輔相成的。所以要開始相信自己最好的一面:相信自己是一個有價值的人,然后開始行動吧。
4. Pay attention to triggers
留神那些“導火索”
Triggers are anything that can start the old tapes playing. If a certain person is a trigger for you, set boundaries with them.
導火索可以使任何讓腦海中消極磁帶播放的人。如果某個人是你的導火索,那么就遠離他們。
5. Develop positive counterstatements to refute negative self-talk
積極反駁內(nèi)心那些消極的聲音
Instead of always putting yourself down in your head, think of some things you actually like about yourself. What are your strengths, what are you good at? Keep your counterstatements in the here-and-now, instead of saying “I’m not good enough” try saying, “I am capable.
I’m good at ______. I accept myself the way I am.”
與其在腦海中一味的打壓自己,還不如想想你到底喜歡自己什么樣子。你的強項是什么,特長是什么?與其說“我不夠好”,不如現(xiàn)在就開始說這句正能量的話語:“我有能力,我擅長....,我喜歡現(xiàn)在的自己。”
Thinking poorly about ourselves gets us nowhere and is extremely self-limiting. Decide today to turn off the negative self-talk channel in your mind and develop your true potential.
妄自菲薄只會讓自己迷失方向,同時限制自身發(fā)展。從今天開始就關(guān)掉內(nèi)心的消極頻道,挖掘自身的潛力吧。