歌頌友情：永不褪色的友誼

I grew up in Jamaica Plain, an urban community located on the outskirts of Boston, Massachusetts. In the 1940’s it was a wholesome, quaint little community. It was my home and I loved it there; back then I thought I would never leave. My best friend Rose and I used to collectively dream about raising a family of our own someday. We had it all planned out to live next door to one another.

我在牙買加平原長(zhǎng)大,那是美國馬薩諸塞州波士頓市郊的一個(gè)城鎮(zhèn)。在20世紀(jì)40年代,那是個(gè)生氣勃勃而又老式別致的小社區(qū)。那是我的家鄉(xiāng),我熱愛的地方。那時(shí),我以為自己永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)離開。我最好的朋友羅斯和我常常一起夢(mèng)想著有一天各自擁有自己的家庭。我們什么都計(jì)劃好了,還想著以后要挨著住,做鄰居。

Our dream remained alive through grade school, high school, and even beyond. Rose was my maid of honor when I got married in 1953 to the love of my life, Dick. Even then she joked that she was just one perfect guy short of being married, thus bringing us closer to our dream. Meanwhile, Dick aspired to be an officer in the Marines and I fully supported his ambitions. I realized that he might be stationed far away from Jamaica Plain, but I told him I would relocate and adjust. The idea of experiencing new places together seemed somewhat romantic to me.

我們的這一夢(mèng)想歷經(jīng)小學(xué)、中學(xué),甚至之后的歲月,從未變更。1953年當(dāng)我嫁給我一生的摯愛——迪克時(shí),羅斯是我的伴娘。那時(shí),她甚至開玩笑說,她就差結(jié)婚了,要不就完美了——這樣就可以離我們的夢(mèng)想更近了。就在那時(shí),迪克決心成為一名海軍陸戰(zhàn)隊(duì)軍官,而我則全力支持他的雄心壯志。我意識(shí)到,他可能會(huì)在牙買加平原以外很遠(yuǎn)的地方駐扎,不過我告訴他我可以重新安家并適應(yīng)下來。和他一起體驗(yàn)新天地的生活,這想法對(duì)我來說有些浪漫。

So, in 1955 Dick was stationed in Alaska and we relocated. Rose was sad to see me leave, but wished me the best of luck. Rose and I remained in touch for a few years via periodic phone call but after awhile we lost track of one another. Back in the 1950’s it was a lot more difficult to stay in touch with someone over a long distance, especially if you were relocating every few years. There were no email addresses or transferable phone number and directory lookup services were mediocre at best.

于是,1955年迪克被安排駐扎在阿拉斯加時(shí),我們搬家了。羅斯對(duì)我的離開感到很難過,但仍祝我好運(yùn)。接下來的幾年里,我們通過定期打電話來保持聯(lián)絡(luò),但不久我們便失去了彼此的音訊。20世紀(jì)50年代那會(huì),要想和遠(yuǎn)方的人保持聯(lián)絡(luò)并不太容易,特別是當(dāng)你每隔幾年就要搬家時(shí)。那時(shí)還沒有電子郵箱或者搬家不換號(hào)的服務(wù),姓名地址查詢服務(wù)也不甚完善。

I thought of her several times over the years. Once in the mid 1960’s when I was visiting the Greater Boston area I tried to determine her whereabout but my search turned up empty-handed. Jamaica Plain had changed drastically in the 10 years I was gone. A pretty obvious shift in income demographics was affecting my old neighborhood. My family had moved out of the area, as did many of the people I used to know. Rose was nowhere to be found.

這些年來,我有好幾次想起了她。20世紀(jì)60年代中期,有一次在我去大波士頓區(qū)時(shí),我嘗試追尋她的下落,但卻搜尋未果。在我離開后的10年里,牙買加平原發(fā)生了巨變。外來人口的大量遷入影響了我的舊社區(qū)。我家早已搬離了那個(gè)地區(qū),從前認(rèn)識(shí)的鄰居中有很多也搬走了。羅斯則杳無音訊,無跡可尋。

52 years passed and we never spoke. I’ve since raised a family of five, all of whom now have families of their own, and Dick passed away a few years ago. Basically, a lifetime has passed. Now here I am at the doorstep to my 80th birthday and I receive a random phone call on an idle Wednesday afternoon. “Hello?” I said. “Hi Natalie, it’s Rose,” the voice on the other end replied. “It’s been so long. I don’t know if you remember me, but we used to be best friends in Jamaica Plain when we were kid” she said.

52年過去了,我們?cè)傥凑f過話。后來,我有了一個(gè)五口之家,現(xiàn)在孩子們也全都有了自己的家庭,而迪克也在幾年前去世了?；旧?我的一生就這么過去了。如今,在我即將邁入八十大壽之際,一個(gè)空閑的周三下午我接到了一個(gè)陌生來電。“喂?”我打招呼道。“嗨,納塔利,我是羅斯。”電話那頭的聲音回應(yīng)道。“已經(jīng)過了這么久了。我不知道你還記不記得我,過去還是小孩子的時(shí)候,在牙買加平原,我們是最好的朋友。”她說道。

We haven’t seen each other yet, but we have spent countless hours on the phone14)catching up on 52 years of our lives. The interesting thing is that even after 52 years of separation our personalities and interests are still extremely similar. We both share a passion for several hobbies that we each picked up independently several years after we lost touch with one another. It almost feels like we are picking up right where we left off, which is really strange considering the circumstances.

我們到現(xiàn)在也還沒再見過面,但我們花了很長(zhǎng)的時(shí)間在電話里互訴了這52年里我們各自的生活。有意思的是,即使是分別了52年,我們的個(gè)性和興趣仍然極其相似。我們都鐘情于某些愛好,而那是在我們失去聯(lián)絡(luò)幾年后各自養(yǎng)成的。這感覺簡(jiǎn)直就像我們才剛剛分別就又重聚了一樣,考慮到現(xiàn)實(shí)情況,這確實(shí)讓人感到有些奇怪。

Her husband passed away a few years ago as well, but she mailed me several photographs of her family that were taken over the years. It’s so crazy, just looking at the photos and listening to her describe her family reminds me of my own; a reasonably large, healthy family. Part of me feels like we led fairly similar lives.

她的丈夫也在幾年前去世了,但她寄了幾張那些年里拍的家庭合影給我。令人興奮不已的是,僅僅是看著這些照片,聽她描述著她的家庭就讓我想起了我自己的家庭;一個(gè)相當(dāng)健康的大家庭。內(nèi)心深處,我感到我們有著極其相似的人生。

I don’t think the numerous similarities between our two lives are a coincidence either. I think it shows that we didn’t just call each other best friend we truly were best friend and even now we can be best friends again. Real friends have two things in common: a compatible personality and a strong-willed character. The compatible personality is what initiates the connection between two people and a strong-willed character at both ends is what maintains the connection. If those two ingredients are present in a friendship, the friendship is for real, and can thus sustain the tests of time and prolonged absence without faltering.

我們兩個(gè)人的生命中有如此多的相似之處,我并不認(rèn)為這僅僅是巧合。我認(rèn)為這表示,我們視彼此為最好的朋友,不只是嘴上說的,而是真真切切地曾經(jīng)為彼此最好的朋友,即使到了現(xiàn)在,我們還是可以成為最好的朋友。真正的朋友有兩個(gè)共同點(diǎn):相容的個(gè)性和堅(jiān)強(qiáng)的品格。相容的個(gè)性是最初連接兩人的紐帶,而這一紐帶的維系則有賴于雙方所擁有的堅(jiān)強(qiáng)品格。如果一段友誼里有著這兩者的存在,那么這段友誼就是真的,這樣一來,它就能經(jīng)受住時(shí)間和長(zhǎng)久分離的考驗(yàn)而毫不“褪色”。