Language Points
"My mother wasn't the best person in the world. She was hooked on her*in for most of my life. She sold our childhood home for drug money. She left me alone to raise my brother and disabled nephew. I used to wake up every night to feed him and change his diapers. I supported us all on the $5.15 an hour that I earned from the grocery store. My mother passed away a few months ago, and I think I'm just now coming to terms with how awful she made my life. This is the most stable I've ever been. I have a permanent address. I have someone who legitimately loves me. But my anxiety has never been worse. I've been having panic attacks recently. I think I've never had to deal with the trauma because things were always coming at me. And now I'm not sure how to handle the quiet."
我的媽媽并不是這個(gè)世界上最好的人。她一直沉迷于海*因;她曾經(jīng)賣(mài)掉了我童年時(shí)的家去買(mǎi)毒品;她常常不管我去照顧我的弟弟和殘疾的侄子。我那時(shí)每晚都要在半夜起來(lái)喂我的侄子,給他換尿布。我需要靠著我在雜貨店打工每小時(shí)掙5.15美金的工資來(lái)養(yǎng)活一家人。我媽媽在幾個(gè)月前去世了,我想我現(xiàn)在慢慢向現(xiàn)實(shí)妥協(xié),她的確把我的生活弄得一團(tuán)糟。我的生活從未如此穩(wěn)定,我終于有了一個(gè)永久的地址;一個(gè)愛(ài)我的人。但我的焦慮卻從未如此嚴(yán)重,我最近常常突然覺(jué)得恐慌。我之前一直忙于解決那些爛攤子以至于沒(méi)有時(shí)間去處理這段創(chuàng)傷,但現(xiàn)在日子漸漸平靜起來(lái)后,我反而不知所措。
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